As I’ve perused the personal finance blogosphere, I’ve noticed that a lot of bloggers used to be pretty bad with money and thus have some amazing come-back stories…things like, “I paid off $60,000 of debt in 8 months.” or, “We paid down 5 credit cards in a year.”, and they tell of moments when the light bulb suddenly went on and they decided to take control of their finances.
Me? I don’t really have an amazing, grab-the-headlines story to put in my sidebar…rather, my tale is one of faithful plodding along the frugal path. I’ve never been a big spender. As a child, I saved almost all of my money, and I can clearly remember that as a teen, I wanted a particular $20 sweater, and I filled at least half a paper with the pros and cons of buying it before I laid out any money (I think I did eventually purchase the sweater, but I am clearly not an impulse shopper!).
I carried my frugal, un-spendy ways into our marriage, and though we’ve never had a high income (we’ve always been below the median, sometimes far below), we’ve navigated through the ups and downs of the last 11.5 years without accumulating any consumer debt. We’ve had a few car loans, but we’ve always paid them off way ahead of time (we have no car loans right now), and we’ve had a mortgage since 2000, but thankfully, those are the only debts we’ve ever had.
As I mentioned on Monday’s Q&A post, by spending carefully, we’ve also always been able to set money aside in a savings account, and that, I think, has been a major key in keeping us out of debt. When cars have needed repairs, when heat pumps have died, when dental work has needed to be done, and when any other unexpected expense has come up, our emergency fund has saved us from putting the bill on a credit card.
This isn’t the sort of story that sells magazines (really! How exciting would it be to read an article entitled, “We stayed out of debt!”??), but honestly, I’d rather have this kind of story. I think it’s much better not to have gotten oneself into debt in the first place than it is to sink deeply into debt and then get out.
My parents always told me they hoped I’d have a boring spiritual conversion story (and I do! Mine isn’t an “I hated God and was doing every wrong/illegal/dangerous thing in the book until God touched my heart.” kind of story), and while I hope the same for my children’s spiritual stories first, I do hope they they have a financial story that is at least as un-riveting as mine.
Do you have a thrilling story, or a boring one like mine?
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That reminds me very much of this Chinese (but I am not 100%sure of its origin) cursing: “may you live in interesting times”. I, just like you, rather have boring story to tell and live in boring times.
I too have a very boring frugal story. Thank goodness! I was not a thrifty person as a kid. I worked from the age of 15 and spent my summer money and saved a little for college. When I got into college, I had to pay for it myself and had one small student loan. I was lucky that I lived at home while in college and my then boyfriend (now husband) gave me money when I could not come up with the tuition payment during the last year of school. It was a great investment for him! I worked three jobs to get through college. My husband lived at home with his parents until we got married. He saved alot of money.
When my husband and I got married, the only way we could afford a house was to build it ourselves. It took us two years to finish the house enough to move in. It was worth the two+ years of work to have our house. We would never have been able to afford our home.
Along the way, we have done all our own landscaping. Any improvements on the house (painting, staining, flooring) we have done ourselves. We have saved a fortune by doing this ourselves.
My mother-in-law is a black belt tightwad. She has taught me how to hang out clothes even in cold weather, shop on a strick budget, buy only when you have the money, save for the large purchases like cars so we have no car payments. My inlaws lived this way and have afforded a great retirement and a great life for themselves and their children. They have the time to spend with their grandchildren and they don’t have to worry about money.
This has all rubbed off on my husband and me. We make less than most of our friends yet we are the only ones who never worry about money. My kids have learned to work and save for what they want. They know they can afford more if they get items on sale, at a yard sale or at a consignment store.
I am glad I have chosen this way of life. We have a great life and no great worries about money. We know we can make it through tough economic times.
Kristen- I love it- “How we stayed out of debt!” Now that’s something people SHOULD be reading. But you’re right- most people like those kind of confessional, “how I mended my ways” type of stories.
It’s unbelievable how much debt people have gotten themselves in, all because they look around and everyone’s doing it, I guess.
Luckily my debt happened on a smaller scale back in college, so I was careful later in life to avoid the Home Equity Loan for the $40,000 kitchen and huge car loans and everything else I saw around me. We prefer to live with an affordable mortgage, buy our cars used for cash, and carry no credit card debt. It’s much less stressful.
Boring and never in debt is BLISS!
We’re not so fortunate to have the boring financial life. I know we put ourselves there but owning a business is a risk that can put you in a good place after time. We do not have a mortgage but it is replaced with a business loan. Our car is almost paid off and we do have some debts but thankfully they are very small. During this hard economical time, and being laid off, I do get worried and consumed with debts. I have reduced many of our bills and spending (thanks frugal bloggers) while still enjoying ourselves. It isn’t easy but it isn’t impossible either.
Nothing about me is boring, really. That’s not really narcistic or anything, just a sort of snapshot of my life.
I lived paycheck to paycheck for a long time through college. I was working two jobs and living at home. I never went really far into debt except with Student loans since I couldn’t get enough scholarships. I also bought a new car after I got my big boy job. Almost 2 years into the job I have the car paid off, one of the two student loans paid off and I’m living rather frugally so that I can spend money on the things I want, someday.
As for the spiritual side of
@Battra92 Whoops, somehow that submitted before I was done.
For the spiritual side of things until I was 20 I believed in God much in the same way that I believed there was a planet Mars: everyone said He existed but I never experienced Him. When I was 20 I had some stressful times and found my way to Christ. I still don’t go to church (bad experiences as a kid with some old people running things for their own selfish needs) but I am an unashamed Born-Again.
So, yeah nothing too too exciting but my life isn’t really boring – at least not most of the time.
I plod along, as well, yet am many years older than you! My one and only debt, that I am still repaying, is a good debt, a loan I took for a specialized school for a teen grandchild that saved her life. I am her only parent and my has investment paid off in a lovely young woman who is now a college student.
I live on a very bare bones budget, yet have a rich life in many ways.
Living Large on Little is my mantra.
My story is boring, too.:P Even as a kid I was frugal, and as an adult I’ve never had credit card debt or auto loan debt. My husband has been in the Air Force since 2000 and I’ve been a stay at home mom, so we’ve always lived on just one income. In 2007 we bought our first home with 20% down, so our mortgage is far below my husband’s housing allowance. (Military people get a set amount each month for housing, based on rank)
I like reading about your “boring” financial stories, Frugal Girl. They speak to me a lot more than the “Crawling back from the brink” tales of woe.:P
I was raised in a frugal not by choice family. My dad was in business for himself and sometimes things were not so great. However, by being raised this way, it taught me to value what is of eternal value. Now I also have my own business and I work for musicians who often have tons of talent but not much cashola. Because I am a frugal girl, I can make do on much less, and help my fellow musician. Music is a fair and glorious gift of God. If I can help music people spread their gift, I feel like the small amount of money I make is good enough!
Your frugal low-debt story may not be headline worthy, but it’s best to keep drama in books and movies and out of the wallet. I think a nice way to help people resist the credit card temptations is to think of it as spending your paycheck before you get it. At the very least, I strive to spend my money AFTER I get it.
Mine’s boring too. Have never been in debt but I was a spendthrift growing up. I have to admit that my parents had a lot to do with knocking some good sense into me about the value of money.
My frugality story is on-going, but also pretty boring. We’ve never racked up debt, we spend below what we earn, etc. I wasn’t very good at managing money after I graduated from college, but I managed to save some money and not get into credit card debt (I had a car loan for several years), and I’ve learned a lot over the years (like buying a used or inexpensive car, not the most expensive one you can afford!).
“Boring” frugality (and spirituality) stories are what I hope for for my kids, too. Getting into and out of debt is not commendable – never being there in the first place is much better! I’m hoping that with the tightening of the credit market, there will be more boring frugality stories and fewer horror stories of people digging themselves into tens of thousands of dollars of debt and then having to waste years or decades getting out.
I’ve thought about this topic for quite some time.
Why are we all enthralled with people who were really dumb about their money and then suddenly “see the light” and then try to get out of 100K of stupid debt like boats, new cars and credit card debt and sometimes waay too much student loan debt?
I’d really rather read about someone like you who had money sense from the first. I’ll bookmark your site. I found it from http://www.getrichslowly.com
BUT…Maybe I read them because it is fun to watch someone come alongside the frugal lifestyle. It is interesting to watch them learn what has been your lifestyle (or mine) for years and years. Maybe it is because they are changing their attitudes, but it is kind of fun to read. Maybe it is because they write well in such an engaging style.
However, I don’t necessarily “respect” them because of their past. In fact, when I read some of the blogs, I think, “Wow, such a stupid/peer-driven person.” And sometimes it comes through even after they are trying to get out of debt. It’s the mindset that says, “I’ve got to have new clothes, or an expensive purse, etc.”. But then, if I continue to see this attitude, I just unsubscribe and read somewhere else. Why waste my time reading them?
I stumbled onto this blog and love it! I am a blended story my family and up till I was 18yrs old was very loose with money and they had alot of it then I meet and marry the greatest guy but his family is hardworking and frugal….now at 55 we have come thru some challenging times but we did manage to pay off a house at age 50,put a daughter thru undergrad and help for grad school,pay cash for wedding and have a few cc to pay off and we will be debt free somewhere in 6months or a year.It is not glamorous and it has caused such a wedge in my family that other than holidays we spend no time with my parents and siblings who all make alot more money and live a very lavish lifestyle.For some reason they took our families inability to spend money the same way as an insult.
Mine is a boring story as well. I have always been a saver and suprisingly, my family is not that way. I tend to reuse and repurpose everything from litter boxes into file holders, to ornaments into lamps. I enjoy seeing how far I can strech a dollar. Right now, I’m working on recognizing when I need to spend money
Also boring, probably because my father was a depression-baby. My mom was ok with the ultra-frugality so long as what she valued, our education, was budgeted for. So we grew up frugal and went to the private colleges of our choice without debt. I would not trade it for all the Ataris and VHSes and vacations to Disney World in the universe.
I had no idea until I started reading this personal finance stuff that people thought the time to get a new car was when their car payment ran out rather than when the car broke down. That never would have crossed my mind. Similarly throwing out leftovers and so on. I taught my husband everything he knows about comparison shopping, saving, investing etc… I had no idea other families didn’t even discuss that sort of thing with their children. (I’m also with you on the pros and cons lists– I think I made my first at age 6.)
I’m really enjoying your blog! The optimism and quiet happiness is infectious.
Two things. One I have lived under the poverty level for over 35 years. Worked hard, and not made much money. Well, hubby is a minister, you do not get what you see on t.v. Sigh.
Two, I was born again at 12, and have had a wonderful Relationsship with J.C.
Just wondering how many people are in your family. We have 6 kids and spend $200 a week on groceries. I am trying to figure out if that is a frugal amount. People are always amazed that we spend so much, but I think it is a good amount for 8 people.
I have a very boring financial life. I did have a small amount of debt from college under $2000. But this was paid off in a few short months. My cars are 10 and 15 years old. Every time something breaks I am reminded that my father told me the cost of the repair is going to be less then a car payment for a year. They will probably not last forever longer and we are going to start putting a significant amount away each month for a new one, but the last car we bought cost $4000 so even our new car is old.
It is good to know that we only have our mortgage to pay and that we have 6 months worth of expenses saved for emergency such as job loss or major illness.
I think it could be great i your kids have a riveting story about finances as long as it is in the positive form.
Any I think all conversion stories are riveting. Even if you faith was built as a small child and has grown over time. I am sure there have been enough times that your soul has been touched and your faith has grown stronger. These are riveting moments and make our conversions something to be remembered.
I do find it wonderful when people can change their lives for the better and am so grateful for a forgiving and loving God. But, I know that it is also many of the stalwart and faithful that go behind the scenes and continue to live righteously that help make a huge difference in the world.
I think living within our means is part of being a good christian.