Thankful Thursday | Thank YOU!
This will be a bit short because I have a mandatory meeting for new nursing students this morning!
This week, I am thankful:
for all of your kind encouragement
Man. You guys left so many lovely comments yesterday about my nursing school acceptance...you all are so wonderful.
It means a lot to me that you all are being so supportive of me, someone most of you have never even met in person!
Thank you, thank you for cheering me on. 🙂
for a stress-free drug test
I had to take a drug test this week for the nursing program, and I was thinking about how drug tests are entirely stress-free when you don't use any drugs. Heh.
Although, funny enough, the day I took my drug test, I was out for my usual early morning walk, and I had to walk right through a thick cloud of weed smoke that apparently someone had left right before I was there.
For a moment I felt worried that this might affect my drug test, but a quick Google search allayed my fears. Whew. Apparently, there's only a problem with false positives if you've been in an enclosed area for a while with people who are smoking.
And relatedly...
for the way public smoking rules have changed
I was feeling kind of annoyed about walking through the cloud of smoke, and that made me think about how, not so very long ago, it was legal to smoke indoors in places like restaurants.
I can remember going out to eat as a kid and hoping we wouldn't get seated too near the smoking section, and now it seems so wild to me that people just sat inside restaurants and smoked cigarettes!
As a non-smoker, I am thankful that so many more places do not allow smoking now. That feels way more equitable to me because we do all share the same air.
for cat snuggles
She almost always comes and sits on my lap when I'm at the table.
And last night while I was watching a show with Zoe, she snuggled into my lap and fell asleep.
I know some cats are very stand-off-ish but there is no doubt that my cat likes to snuggle!
for coffee
It's a lovely morning delight, with cream and sugar. 🙂
for the improvements in women's rights
My girls and I were talking this week about how, a mere five years before I was born, women could not get a mortgage without a man co-signing.
That is SO wild to me to think about. I take it for granted that I can have my own bank account and my own business and that one day, I will have a mortgage in my name as well.
Also, as I have navigated this whole leaving-my-marriage thing, I have frequently thought about how impossible this would have been in the past. I have so much more freedom and so many more choices than my female forebears.
I don't think we've completely arrived when it comes to equality, but goodness, it's definitely better than it's ever been before.
________________
Alrighty...I gotta head out to my meeting! Which reminds me: I'm so thankful for this opportunity! I get to go learn a pile of practical skills, and then I can use them to help people.
I'm so, so grateful! 🙂
What are you thankful for this week?
"a mere five years before I was born, women could not get a mortgage without a man co-signing"
Not really true. Single women could and did get mortgages before then--however, it was legal for banks to refuse to issue them. That is not the same thing as "couldn't get a mortgage ever."
I am thankful for women's equality as well although we still have a ways to go. My mom was fired from her Wall Street job when she got pregnant in 1963.
I am thankful for BFF's brother--we've been one another's shoulder to cry on. Yesterday he was throwing away BFF's Christmas cards, which were mostly unopened since she went to the hospital a good week before Christmas. I'm glad to be there for him.
I am glad that my son is once again leaving for the Cannes Film Festival in a day or so--too much drama around the house lately.
I am thankful for Kristen and you other commenters! And that Kristen got into nursing school but I never doubted it for a second.
@Rose, it never occurred to me to doubt it either.
@Rose,
I had no doubts either. It is very reassuring that our judgment can be trusted though!
@Rose, In 1973 I had a female obstetrician in the nice part of town, pretty successful woman! She told me she was unable to get a mortgage for a hoouse of her own.her father had to sign for a mortgage!! I have heard more stories than just hers.. so, it was ALMOST impossible.. hard for young women today to even believe! I am glad to see progress for women in certain areas and am hoping for more freedoms to come!
@Madeline, Where are you located? Because here in New York, it was not almost impossible at all.
I'm just pointing out that this seems to be a bit of common knowledge spread by the internet and it's not necessarily true.
@Rose,
This probably varied a lot regionally. I don’t think that people are spreading misinformation. I think they are telling true stories that weren’t necessarily how things worked everywhere.
I know that when my mother got married in 1972, she could not get a department store charge card in her own name. The card had to be in my father’s name and she had to be added as an authorized user. At the time, my mom was earning a nice salary and putting my dad through college. He was not working at all.
Could she have gotten ANY credit card in her name? I have no idea. I just know that she couldn’t get this one, and that does seem crazy nowadays.
The inequity in that story is just wild. There is literally no explanation for that other than that she was refused because she's a woman.
Thank goodness we've made a lot of progress since then!
I'm one of the many who you've never met in person, but I feel like I know you through your writing! I am so proud of you and I'm rooting for you!
Kristen, I'm thankful there are people like you who want to be nurses, because I am definitely not one of those people. The fact that you have so many people rooting for you despite never meeting in person is a testament to your character and the community you have built. I'm thankful for your courage and transparency as you navigate hard times.
I'm thankful for my son, who turns twelve today. He has enriched my life in ways I cannot even convey. I'm proud he is my son and proud to be his mom.
Kristen - count me among the people who are so excited you have been accepted to nursing school! I was accepted to a nursing program as a single mom in her 40s (after my marriage ended in a pretty craptacular way...), and I can't wait to hear about your adventures.
Things I am thankful for - nursing school edition:
The semester ended last week, and we have a 3 week break before summer session starts!
My clinical instructor from MedSurg II told me that she has no doubt that I've chosen the right career path.
My classmates. I worried that coming in as an older adult I would have a hard time connecting with my peers. I am thankful I was wrong! The beauty of community college is that there are all kinds of people enrolled, and I am finding a lovely, diverse group of friends.
Our chest freezer. I'm taking some time over break to prep some freezer meals for clinical days. I have OB/Peds this summer, and will probably have two 10-12 hour clinical days a week on top of 2 campus days. This will help us avoid takeout.
My (new) husband. He is so supportive and jumps in to offload some of my daily tasks when I'm swamped with studying and homework.
Pam
Thankful for DH's and my handy guy friend, for reasons explained in Tuesday's FFT.
Thankful for the neighbors who gave me my mini-greenhouse 3 years ago. It's just gotten my basil, zinnia, and other tender seedlings through last night's light frost.
And thankful for the FG community--source of great frugal advice, mutual support, and all-around good vibes!
I am thankful for Kristen's earlier post mentioning a menopause podcast, which led to a discussion in the comments. The symptoms mentioned made for an "Aha!" moment, as my body has gone absolutely haywire the past several months: inexplicable weight gain despite being active and a healthy diet, anxiety, periods/cramps to die for, mood swings, energy levels all over the place, night sweats, etc. Reading the comments was like ticking boxes. The thing is, I only just turned 40!!! However, thanks to the discussions here, I asked my mother about her experience, and she hit menopause at 42! So many months of "What is happening?!" now have an answer. Thank you, everyone, for helping me figure that out so that I can pursue steps to mitigate it.
Super thankful for that podcast!
@N,
My now retired GP said with great aplomb that a pregnancy takes 9 months and menopause takes 9 years. It was not quite what I wanted to hear, but it did help me manage my expectations and patiently practise self care while my body was working to adjust to new hormone levels.
Yup, I'm old enough that I remember smoking areas in the back of airplanes, which is a disgusting thought indeed.
Thankfuls:
--For RAIN! An inch so far at our house, and more on the way this weekend. So desperately needed.
--For the end of the school year today. Hooray!
--For an entire hour I got to hold a baby yesterday. We had a staff vs. students volleyball game, and one of the staff players is a former teacher who had this baby girl three months ago. My contribution to our staff team was holding the baby so her mom (who is our volleyball coach and a former collegiate player) could play. It was not much of a sacrifice for me. 🙂
--For my middle son, who has matured so much in the last couple of years. We have our school awards assembly today. He has typically refused to go stand up in front of the whole school while his teachers praise their class, but this year he said he will. This is a big step for him, and I'm proud of him.
--For teachers who are accepting of different kids (see above), but who also insist on challenging those same kids to improve themselves. My youngest son's 2nd grade teacher really got her kids to reach this year. She expected a lot of them, and she got it. She wasn't mean, and her class liked her a lot, but she definitely had high standards and held her class to them.
--For teachers in general. Working as I do on the periphery of the teaching profession (I'm a teacher's aide), I see how much heart and soul and plain hard work teachers expend for their students, and I am so grateful for it. Thank you to ALL teachers.
@kristin @ going country, re volleyball game and baby holding... Many years ago I was a young mom and recent graduate who had played collegiate volleyball. I managed to coach a team of high school girls only thanks to the kind team moms who volunteered to be baby-chasers during practices and games. Thanks for the fun memory! And I'm sure your young teacher very much enjoyed getting back on the court while someone snuggled the baby 🙂
@kristin @ going country, I always thought smoking sections on airplanes and in restaurants were a joke.
If you happened to be sitting next to said sections how did the smoke know not to go by you.
As they say, it's like having a peeing section in a pool. 😉
@karen, it was the dumbest thing in the world. If one person is smoking, everyone in the entire room/airplane smells it.
@karen, I remember as a kid being on an 8-9 hour flight when smoking was allowed. After 9 hours smoke is everywhere whether you are in the section or not.
My goodness, what a terrible situation. I can only imagine how smoky the air was!
@kristin @ going country, I love the baby-holding one! My eldest is on choir tour right now, and when I talked to him this morning (after several days), he had to tell me about the baby-holding he got to do at a church yesterday.
That cat is such a lover.
1. I'm thankful that I can finally eat solid food again, albeit in small amounts and it must be chewed thoroughly. My dogs are happy, too, since they usually get last bites of any protein I'm eating.
2. I'm thankful that DH liked his homemade anniversary card and asked me to put it on his bedside shelving unit, so he could see it. I've made him a lot of cards over the years, but I wasn't sure it would still please him that much now.
3. I'm thankful that we are getting rain. It will bring on even more mosquitoes, but we need the rain.
4. I'm thankful that my old seeds sprouted in my raised beds. I only use a few seeds each year in my raised beds so I kept the remainders refrigerated. This will be my third year of using some of them, but probably this will be the last year for the oldest ones.
5. And, as always, I'm thankful for my grown children. They are some of the most fun people I know.
@JD, I keep my old seeds in a plastic snap-tight box with plenty of silica gel packets in the freezer. They last quite a long time there (depending on the type, of course; parsley, carrots, and other members of that family don't last as long as others). My record is 15 years for some lettuce seeds.
@A. Marie, wow, that is great to hear.
Thankful for Abigail Adams who, in 1776, wrote to her husband John Adams, one of our “Founding Fathers” (emphasis on fathers), asking that the founders “Do not put such unlimited power into the hands of husbands. Remember, all men would be tyrants if they could. If particular care and attention is not paid to the ladies, we are determined to foment a rebellion, and will not hold ourselves bound by any laws in which we have no voice or representation.”
Not thankful for John Adams who replied “I cannot but laugh. Depend upon it, we know better than to repeal our masculine systems.” So in accordance with English common law, the founders decided that certain white males would have legal rights but women could not vote, own property if they were married, keep their own wages, or even have custody of their children.
Thankful that -- 144 years later! -- on August 26, 1920, women finally won the right to vote in the United States.
Thankful that in 1974 (almost 200 years after Abigail asked John to pay attention to the ladies), with passage of the Equal Credit Opportunity Act, it became illegal for banks and other creditors to discriminate on the basis of sex or marital status, and women (married or single) were granted the legal right to, for example, open a credit card in their own name.
And thankful that in 1981 the U. S. Supreme Court overturned state laws that allowed husbands to control jointly-owned property without their wives’ consent by, for example, mortgaging their home without the knowledge of the wife.
@JDinNM, sing it sister!
@JDinNM, thanks for the history lesson, always good to be informed of how far we have come.
@karen, Martin Luther King, Jr., reminded us that “the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.” Change takes a long time, but it does happen. But we do have to work for it.
@JDinNM, that day white women were granted the right to vote. Black women had to wait an additional 50 years, a challenge that was made harder since most suffrage groups dissolved once white women could vote. This comment isn't even just to you specifically, but rather a reminder to us that this type of gatekeeping injustice didn't get fixed that day for many of our citizens!
@Rachel, I appreciate your comment, and even more the sentiment behind it. But it is not technically correct. After the Nineteenth Amendment giving women (all women, Black and White and all others) the right to vote was ratified, Black women voted in elections and held political offices. But many States passed laws that discriminated against Black Americans (men and women) and severely limited their actual ability to vote. Mary McLeod Bethune formed the National Council of Negro Women in 1935 to pursue this struggle for civil rights. People had to work over several decades to secure the reality of the right to vote, and in 1965 the Voting Rights Act was passed, as a result of more than a century of work by Black women to make voting easier and more equitable.
And anyone who follows the news is aware that the fight continues, as various states (aided by state and federal courts) continue to turn back the progress that was made and enact restrictions and burdens on people's right to vote.
@JDinNM, Thank you, JD, that's another bit of "wisdom" from the internet but I didn't want to get into it.
@JDinNM, thanks for even more clarification! I started writing it out on my tablet with swipe text, got overwhelmed, and decided to leave the comment short. Thanks for filling it out!
@Rachel, Thank you for putting the issue front and center! What good is the legal right to vote if, in actuality, you can't exercise it? This is a battle that never seems to end. And none of us is free until all of us are free.
@JDinNM, Thank you for all that info! And how prescient of Abigail Adams
My grandmother bought houses and had rentals on her own most of her adult life. And my mom was a realtor and bought land and houses in her own name cause I remember it made my dad mad, he wanted his name on the ownership but she said no. She owned a house when they met. Lol. They always said they were a great pair, she owned a house and he owned a car in their early 20’s.
I’m thankful for my mom and grandma and the examples they were to me. I grew up thinking that was the norm.
Proverbs 31:16 says a capable wife sets her mind on a field and buys it. In Numbers 27 the daughters of Zelophehad received a portion of land.
@Tiana,
My husband wanted to name our baby after one of the daughters of Zelophehad if the baby is a girl. It is one of the Bible stories I skimmed over but it made a big impression on him.
@Tiana, One of my friends' mothers inherited a house and as per the deceased's will, it was put in her name only. Good thing, too, because she later divorced. My friend's dad announced he was going to keep the house and boot his (soon to be ex-)Mrs. to the curb. But he soon found he couldn't do that -- the house was in HER name. This is an important lesson for all the ladies to hear: protect your assets, even when you marry or enter a relationship, because Prince Charming could turn out to be an ogre.
@Fru-gal Lisa, Good old Joan Rivers said once, "Love your husband, worship your husband, but get as much as you can in your own name."
@Rose, That's no joke. She was right!
@Fru-gal Lisa, I think she was great. One of the old-school entertainers and funny as anything. I recommend her documentary "A Piece of Work."
@Tiana, my Mom stood her ground but at 85 we couldn’t give her the care she needed at home and she moved to a medical facility. One day my dad came to see her and brought papers. He said sign the house to me or I won’t come visit you. I’ll pay for all your expenses but no visiting. She said no. After 2 weeks she called him and signed the papers.
@Tiana, wow, just wow. So sorry he chose a house over your mom.
Kristen, I just had to comment about here about having to sit in restaurants with smokers. I'm 30 years older than you and for DECADES I had to sit/work in offices with co-working smokers and there was absolutely nothing that could be done about it.
I live in California and there are now pretty strict laws about any public smoking, and boy am I glad.
@Anne, I remember those smoky offices! I had my own office at a job and smokers would come in to use the copy machine. I finally asked them to not smoke in my room and felt so brave talking like that to adults (I was 17 years old).
@Central Calif. Artist, good for you.
A couple of your observations hit home today. I grew up in a home where both my parents smoked. It was not until I left home that I realized that a headache every night was not something that was inevitable. My mom smoked because women were told in ads that it would help prevent weight gain. Nearly everyone smoked, and not just in restaurants. They smoked at work on public transportation and even in doctors offices and hospitals. My husband became a respiratory therapist because he figured people would always need help with breathing.
The second was women’s rights. We fought hard for equal pay. I remember when Title IX was pasted for sports. Sports for women was not really a thing before that. They are still fighting that battle especially for equal pay and now losing to men in women’s sports so losing sports scholarships. The battle is not over. Your daughter would never have been able to become a flight mechanic. Our choices were secretary and teacher, then marriage. Only rich kids got to go to college so my choice was office work or retail. On any household bills the husbands name was on the bill not the wife’s. So all our bills had my husbands name and I had trouble closing them when we moved because I was not on the bill. My husband had never paid any of those bills I was always in charge of the checkbook because I was better at it, still am. It is why we had money to retire cause he would spend every penny he ever had.
Well that was a walk down memory lane.
@Nancy H, and all the other ladies,
Be ever vigilant about women's rights and go out to vote. We could lose all the rights we have fought so hard to win. Male-controlled legislatures and Supreme Courts are rescinding some laws and passing others, mostly about reproductive rights, that can turn the clock back to the Dark Ages. Regardless about what you think about abortion or birth control, such things are YOUR (and, possibly, your husband's) private business and it should not be up to a bunch of men (who don't even know you) as to what you can and cannot do in your personal life. (What if you got raped and pregnant? What if your life was at risk? Etc.) They may start at reproductive right but it is always possible that they will try to restrict your rights in other areas such as mortgages and banking. Register to vote, educate yourself about issues/candidates and show up a the ballot box. Every. Single. Time.
@Fru-gal Lisa, I totally agree with you the need for women to educate themselves and vote in every single election!
@Nancy H, thank you for mentioning women's sports! The injustice of mediocre male athletes taking spots reserved for women is absolutely horrific. I have a teen girl athlete and this hits really close to home.
@Fru-gal Lisa,
The notion that abortion is a right that women are entitled to is confusing. If women have rights based on their status as human beings, shouldn't unborn human beings have rights (such as the right to live) based on their status as human beings?
You state that regardless of my thoughts on abortion, I should recognize it as a private matter. The way in which human beings are protected or disposed of - and the standard by which human beings are awarded rights as basic as the right to life - is a matter of public interest. As human beings concerned about human rights, we are obligated to defend the rights of those humans who cannot speak for themselves.
Saying that a woman's decision to abort an unborn child is an entirely up to her because it is "her personal life" is like saying that I have a right to murder my toddler because they impact "my personal life."
Laws against abortion protect human rights. Laws enabling abortion strip human beings of rights.
@Fru-gal Lisa, thank you for this posting. The danger is real.
@Sarah K, when I was a college student 50 years ago, the women's gymnastics team won first in state. Did they go to Nationals? Of course not! The male administrators said ours was a "teaching college" and that the female athletes were there only to become teachers. (Not coaches, mind you, but girl's PE teachers. This was the 1970s, after all.). So there was no reason to foot the bill for them to go any farther up the competition ladder, the men said, esp. since it was out of state. Now may I suggest to you had this been a men's team, esp. football, the college would've beat the bushes -- gotten it in the press, contacted the alum association, moved funds from other depts., etc. -- to raise funds for the guys to keep advancing in their competition. But they didn't see the need since the gymnastic champs were "only" women (and therefore did not have athletic scholarships, either.) True story!
@Jamie, Your religious beliefs and mine are very different. Esp. since I am a rape survivor. I think I would've committed suicide had I been forced to carry that horrible thug's seed within me. But I respect your right to your own beliefs and encourage you to vote.
@Fru-gal Lisa,
I am sorry that you had to endure the horror of rape, and wish you healing.
I am curious about your comment on my religious beliefs. I have not made any statement about my religion or any religious claims. Why are you dismissing my argument as a reflection of a particular religious belief?
@Fru-gal Lisa, She didn't mention her religious beliefs.
@Jamie, Sorry, I read between the lines. Where I live some churches make a political issue into a litmus test.
@Jamie, so beautifully said - we ARE obligated to defend life, and in a time that ending an eagle's life (or a sea turtle's life, etc.) carries a stiff penalty, it doesn't make sense that ending a human's life is deemed "less than" those of animals.
I carried a thug's baby - and since I am a proud 'religious', I can say that it was only by the grace of God that I could. That grace carried us through 20+ years and my child is/was truly an unexpected gift that not only matters to me, but to my whole family, his friends, his teachers, his co-workers. He matters and it is beautiful to behold, through incredibly hard times and incredibly good times.
I am sorry for the trauma, for the memory that never ever is far from mind. I am sorry for violence and the violation. But for me, the baby was not responsible, the thug was.
@Fru-gal Lisa,
Thank you for responding. It seems as if you are still side-stepping my argument and avoiding my question, which I ask sincerely.
I originally asked about your belief that abortion is an important right for women, and argued that abortion strips an entire class of human beings of basic rights. You attributed my position to personal religious convictions. When I pointed out that I was not grounding my position in religion, you then deflected with a comment about the way some churches use "political issues."
Is abortion a moral issue? I believe that it is, and suspect that you do as well, even though we disagree on the morally correct path. Moral concerns over the legal protections we afford human beings absolutely belong in the public square, even when they are also "personal." And moral concerns absolutely belong in churches and religious communities, even when they are also "political."
I am still curious how one reconciles the conviction that women have rights with the idea that unborn women and men don't have rights. Again, if women have rights because they are human beings, shouldn't those rights extend to all human beings?
I had never thought about the mortgage thing. I bought my first house back in 2005, after a very difficult time in my life, in which I’d also racked up large credit card debt. That was a big enough challenge, I can’t imagine needing special permission due to lack of whiskers. Home ownership, in your own name, will be an especially rewarding moment after these extra hard years.
That is so true! It'll be a very proud moment for me!
Thankful that. . .
. . .Kristen got into nursing school! (and that good people want to be nurses because eew)
. . .my house is paid for (twelve years now, but still so relieved). Kristen's comment about getting a mortgage gave me a flashback to house payments.
. . .high school best friend and I will get together this morning (at least 30 years since we've seen each other)
. . .the electricity was only out for 9 hours yesterday (still don't know why) which makes me super grateful to have it on
. . .climbing roses in my yard are at their peak (looking for spring things to be thankful for when all the green has died on the hillsides)
I am thankful that I am able to enjoy my morning coffee.
I am thankful that the incline pillow seems to be helping mitigate pregnancy reflux.
I am thankful that I slept last night. What a relief.
I am thankful that the baby is healthy so far.
I am thankful for a friend with a truck who is happy to help us pick up furniture.
So much to be thankful for! First, this blog and community, it is tops!
My cousin who came to my rescue and fixed my rototiller so that I could get my garden
growing. He has wings!
My best neighbor who is bartering with me for projects. So appreciated.
Eating fresh veggies out of the garden now and hopeful for a great year of fruit from the orchard.
Thankful for my big (25 lb maine coon) sweet kitty who caught a mole. He has been stalking this creature for days as it wreaked havoc on my septic system's drain field. Extra treats for him!
This is a day late - I am so excited for Kristen starting the fun part of nursing school, I can remember the first patient I ever took care of! My dad was very ill for 9 years and his case was acute, he loved having student nurses and being used for training. I had specialty training that his local hospital did not have, so we would put on workshops to show techniques. I used every ounce of critical care training to care for him.
I had a very strange evening yesterday. First, I received the email of news we've all been expecting but dreading: my terminally-ill cousin passed away after a long, courageous battle with cancer. Even though I was an adopted child, he treated me with love and kindness and total acceptance all my life. I am thankful to have had him as my cousin, and even more thankful that all the relatives of my parents' generation chose to live in the same city so we could grow up together. We were therefore very close. He and I were the last living members of our generation of relatives on Dad's side.
The other unusual thing is that I was contacted by someone via ancestsry.com who turns out to be a biological relative. We think he's my (half-) nephew by my (half-)brother. The nephew, too, grew up in a loving family and wants to connect with his biological kinfolks. I met the brother before he died in the Covid pandemic, and it was the first time I've ever been around someone who is blood-kin to me. I am therefore thankful for DNA tests that allow us to know the truth about our backgrounds, find answers to our questions, and to obtain closure.
I'm thankful for my friends who give me love, support and understanding even during the bad times. Especially during those times.
I'm thankful for the jobs I have.
I'm thankful that I learned how to be frugal, to have a good credit rating, to shop at the thrift stores, to live in a paid-for home. Not sure what'll happen should the government default on its loans, but at least I've done what I could to minimize any problems.
@Fru-gal Lisa, I am sorry for your loss of your cousin. The older we get, the more precious are those who "knew us when."
I am so sorry to hear of your cousin's passing. Love to you. <3
@Fru-gal Lisa, The DNA tests have changed the lives of so many. In the last 2 years, 3 people I know have found close relatives. A friend found he had a half-sister, and my niece found out she had a half-brother. Another friend found his biological family.
@Lindsey, and @Kristin, thank you both for your condolences. My sweet cousin's passing was certainly not unexpected, as he fought a very long battle with cancer. God has granted him peace and perfect healing at long last, IMO. But I will miss him forever. Thank you again for your sympathy.
@Jody S., Yes. I was tickled to have, in effect, done an "end run" around the laws and barriers that blocked me from learning the basic information about my life. One more example of men in high places interfering in people's private lives. IMO once an adoptee is an adult, he or she should be entitled to health information and etc. If I'd known my biological relatives had been diagnosed with "female cancer," I might not have been blindsided by mine. Had I known, I could have made different medical decisions years ago.
@Fru-gal Lisa, when I was a kid in the 1950s, my parents moved across the country, away from all relatives. I was so saddened growing up that I had no aunts, uncles, cousins or grandparents. Fast forward to 2023, a cousin contacted me through ancestry.com. She lives in another state and is 40 years younger than me, but we are having a great time checking out each other's lives by email.
@Anne, I have been delighted to correspond with some of my biological relatives. We have found some amazing coincidences. My half-sister had a swimming pool and, like me, loved water aerobics. My half-brother's daughter is an English teacher, too. A blood cousin lived about 100 miles from me at one point; we had both moved halfway across the country, to another state that was far from our hometowns. And then we returned to our home states. And so it goes....
This week I am thankful for …
How my ‘village’ helped my son. I was volunteering at a fundraiser on Monday when my son called to tell me he hurt his arm just before practice. I was able to have my parents check on him (they were closer to him than I was) and let me know if ice and rest was enough or if I needed to take him in that night. They got him home and comfortable. I also called my neighbor, who is a hand therapist, to check on him to give me her opinion. She whipped together a splint so that he was able to be comfortable until I could get him to see a doctor.
How quick our orthopedic urgent care clinic was able to see my son. I took him in early Tuesday morning (as soon as they opened) and he was quickly seen by the doctor, had x-rays, and was sent home with care instructions for a fractured elbow.
My son’s fracture is tiny. He’s still hurting and uncomfortable, but didn’t need to be casted. He was back in school on Tuesday and played in his band concert on Tuesday night. He’ll have to sit on the sidelines for a few weeks but he should be back in action soon and not miss too much of summer fun.
I was able to take a day off work and volunteer at a golf tournament to help raise money for cancer research. The day was gorgeous and the people I was volunteering with are always fun to be around. I also got to zip around on a golf cart which is always fun.
I spent Mother’s Day with my parents, grandparents, husband, and son. My husband made us a delicious pasta lunch. I’m always thankful for every chance I get to spend time with my 84 year old grandma and 92 year old grandpa!
This week I am thankful for a brother who encouraged me, after I explained how discouraged I was that most of our sprouts died and I don't know if I want to try again this year. I didn't feel like it, but I planted some anyway... and I feel better about it.
Thankful that my husband didn't share too much of his disappointment about the seedlings like I did. I get discouraged much more easily than he does, so he kept up beat.
Thankful that we were able to take our three boys (one grown and moved out) and the older two's girlfriends to see The Mario Bros Movie. Everyone enjoyed it. I kept the oldest and his girlfriend going a secret until we were going to pass their place on the way to the theater. My husband pulled his sunglasses down, looked at me with a huge smile, gave me a fist bump, and said "this is now 100% more awesome! Thanks for thinking to invite them!"
Thankful my bosses aren't here at work today. It's sad to say, but when I was describing how the higher manager behaves, it dawned on me that she's mentally/verbally abusive. The kind we warn out kids to look out for. :/ since that revelation, I decided to have a meeting with HR and the higher than her manager. I have specific ways she's abusive, and believe I would do better under someone else who doesn't treat people the way she does.
I'm thankful hospitals exist, but am discouraged by the way our trip to the ER went on Sat. We didn't need an ER but of course the eye Dr and pediatrician don't work Saturday evenings... when I figured my youngest has pink eye. We saw the triage nurse, a second nurse who took his vitals, a third nurse who asked the same questions as the first two, then the dr, and finally someone who asked for our billing address and stuff that the triage nurse already asked for. It was a bit much for pink eye, and when the final guy came in and asked how we'll be paying the $300 deductible, I honestly responded with, "panic?!?! I didn't bring my purse! I didn't know we would be coming here." So again, thankful they exist. Truly. They've been helpful for many other trips.
@Lisa, very sad to read about your mentally/ verbally abusive boss; it happened to me too. I was with a company for 13 years, I loved my job and was very good at it; this bad boss came in sometime during my tenure and was terribly abusive towards me, and the higher up manager was taken in by her; in the end I just walked out of the company. I learned that I should never ever again define my life by my work alone. I wish you well and hope that there is a solution to getting away from the abusive boss.
This week's thankfuls:
For great gardening weather
The start of a week's holiday
Mother's day messages from our kids
A wonderfully relaxed Saturday last week
The prospect of friends visiting next Saturday - we have missed them!
Thankful for thankful Thursdays. It's such a good way to reset my brain.
For pleasant temperatures, for all the lovely green outside now, for my son getting moved into his summer apartment, for my husband and in-laws who helped him do that, and for some good conversation time with my 17-year-old daughter, I give thanks.
Thankful that you chose to continue your blog.
I enjoy reading all the posts.
Congratulations on your acceptance to nursing school.
I thought it was really nice how many unfamiliar names were in the comments congratulating FG yesterday. It seems like there are so many people who wouldn't normally comment but couldn't help but share their joy for you. That's some good karma right there.
I'm thankful that my brother is a orthopedic surgeon and is stepping up to help my mom as she is navigating the space to knee surgery in the next few months. Also that I didn't have be the first one out of bed over mother's day weekend. Usually I'm the one getting breakfast and lunch going and waking up the kids. Thankful for this bizarre dream I had about my grandma this morning. It didn't make sense but it was nice to see her moving and feel her spirit since she passed away a number of years ago. thankful that my husband is as involved with the kids as he is. I was reading this reddit thread about how often kids' fathers don't know basic information about their kids and I'm glad that my husband is so actively involved. These days, I'd say he spends more direct time working with them than even I do. I'm glad we're doing this parenting thing together. Lastly, thankful for chips, hashbrowns, homemade cookies, and indian flatbread made by mom. They are staples in my life that bring me joy (even though none of them are particularly good for me).
@CrunchyCake, when I dream about my deceased parents, I feel like I've had a little visit from them. I know it sounds odd, but I find it comforting.
I think this is my second time commenting but huge congratulations Kristen on getting into nursing school!
I too am grateful for the progress that has been made towards gender equality particularly in the workforce, although there is still work to be done. I was reminded of this when I sat for the CPA exam this week and the lady that walked in behind me brought her breast pump with her. I kept thinking to myself, wow there is only 1 allowed 15 minute break during the exam and if you go over that time, it cuts into your exam time. She would have needed to prepare harder to ensure she could finish the exam faster than others. A reminder that women often need to work harder to achieve the same professional recognition as men.
I have a lot to be thankful for but this week I am especially thankful to my husband's three golf buddies. I mentioned before that in August we are going on our Last Hurrah trip, taking the ferry to Washington, driving across country visiting places and friends, leaving the vehicle in NYC and going to Europe, coming back and driving home through Canada. A lifetime of adding bits to a special account for this trip and we are finally going to cash it all in and go. We lived in Scotland and have been to Europe, especially to Russia and the Baltics, a number of times due to relatives, but we are a lot older now. A few weeks ago I woke up in a cold sweat, having dreamt that the husband died and I was alone and could not figure out how to get home and I just kept wandering around aimlessly while the corpse rotted. For days after I obsessed, thinking about how I have only driven outside of Alaska once and the result was not good (I managed to get through grad school on the East Coast without ever getting a license. I was 28 when I finally did) so the idea of finding how to get home leaves me in a panic...So my husband plays golf (indoor in the winter and outdoor in the summer) with three guys and they go out to eat once a week and solve the problems of the country. He told them about my fears. The next week they came to lunch with a plan: they had appointed one of them as the point man and if anything happens to the husband, I have only to call him and two of the three guys will come to me, no matter where the corpse and I are. They will get me on a plane home, get the body home, pick up Pound Hound from the kennel we are leaving him in while in Europe, and drive our vehicle back to Alaska. Since these guys are all in their 70s, they decided it was best if two of them rescued me, just in case it was too much for one to handle. The husband and I were blown away by the fact that they hatched a plan and are ready to take over in an emergency. All three said they would want someone to do that for their wives (all in their 70s also and married for decades) so it seemed like the right thing to do. So, all my thankfulness this week is toward these guys, two of whom have never met me because I detest golf, and yet they are willing to extend themselves this way. I feel a lot, lot better about undertaking this trip now.
@Lindsey, How wonderful that your husband's golf buddies came up with a plan to help in case of emergency!
@Lindsey, Your comment brought tears to my eyes. I only hope that if the need arises one or more of my husband's many friends would also step up. You are so blessed to have both your husband but also his friends in your life.
@Lindsey, This is beautiful. No matter how often it happens in its many forms, human compassion is still so moving.
@Lindsey, wow. Isn't it wonderful to know that so many people have your back?
@Lindsey, I'm so glad to hear that you too have friends who completely have your and the husband's backs. Blessings on them all, and both of you too.
@Lindsey, I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I guess I'll laugh until I cry.
@Lindsey, My grandmother used to have a favorite poem, "Make new friends but keep the old/One is silver and the others are gold." Sounds like your husband's three old friends are absolute gold!
Congratulations Kristen! Getting into nursing school is a big deal! You will do great and your patients will be lucky to have you! 🙂
I'm old enough to remember when people smoked everywhere. There was even a "smoking court" at my high school. You just needed a note from your parent to be able to out at break for a smoke!
Thankful list for the week:
1) Thankful that I get pictures every day from my daughter while she is on her vacation to Italy. Thankful but a little jealous!
2) Thankful for slightly cooler temperatures yesterday and today.
3) Thankful that I was able to get more plants in the ground yesterday and all the ones I planted over the weekend are alive and doing well.
4) Thankful for my glowing performance review at work and a nice raise to go with it.
5) Thankful for my group of close-knit girlfriends that have been friends for decades. One was about to marry a man when he suddenly married someone else. I'm so glad that we all banded together to console her and that we all provide such great support for each other no matter what is going on.
@Beverly, Tell your jilted girlfriend (no. 5) that she dodged a bullet. Her ex sounds like a real creep.
An amazing post and comments today. I am thankful for this community.
I am thankful for the continued lovely spring weather. It doesn't get any better than this, in my opinion. Some years we go from cool to hot and humid in the blink of an eye but this year are having a truly lovely spring.
I am thankful for a delicious lunch yesterday. A friend treated me to a new to me restaurant and my meal (wild mushroom ravioli) was delicious.
I am thankful for a body that still works well and the ability to get through each day without thinking about it.
I am thankful I had the mental energy to deal with making phone calls yesterday to deal with "things gone wrong" in this new world of novice employees with very little training.
I am thankful our new neighbors are so excited about their "new to them" house. It will be an adjustment from our wonderful former neighbors but it will all be good. I know it is a privilege to have lived in the same house for a long time.
Congratulations, Kristen. (For what it's worth, I don't really foresee any major problems in your studies either because you're smart and a hard worker and you have people skills. You'll be fine!)
I am thankful:
*for the kindest words from my father-in-law. We were face-timing, and I was showing them how my face was coming along. I mentioned that I still couldn't really smile on the right side of my face, and he said, "Jody, that doesn't matter so much because you're smile is always in your voice."
*that my sister-in-law (who I have little contact with) surprised me with the most beautiful hand-made card and then followed that up with a $50 gift card to April Cornell! This was so out-of-the-blue!
*for helpful kids.
*for how cute the little chicks are when they hop on their momma's back for a ride.
*that there are fewer public places for smoking. I grew up in a home where both parents smoked (like chimneys), and I cannot stand the smell of cigarette smoke.
*that most of my kids forget or don't know the word "cigarette."
*that my son is doing better with learning to drive.
*for a chiropractic adjustment.
@Jody S., My dad chain smoked for 64 years. From age 12 till when he died (of something not smoking-related!) at age 76. if he got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, he lit a cigarette. When I was richer, I promised to buy my dad a Corvette if he stopped smoking. He wasn't able to.
None of us kids smoked, but of course my son, who takes after my dad something fierce, did or does. He generally vapes now, which smells awful.
@Jody S., My father smoked like he was being paid to do so. I took up smoking at 17 and lasted one month. I set my jacket pocket on fire twice and decided I was too clumsy to have matches on me all the time.
@Rose, My mother died of COPD; she just couldn't kick the habit until it was too late. My father was able to quit cold turkey about 25 years ago.
@Lindsey, That reminds me of a former co-worker's story: her father caught her smoking, and he made her smoke non-stop until she vomited. She never smoked again.
@Jody S., I LOVE April Cornell clothing! For awhile that was almost all I wore and I still wear skirts that are 20+ years old. (and keep others that I don't wear but it almost causes physical pain to think of giving them away).
I am very thankful for spring and the hope of new life and warmth and sunny, summer days ahead. I love all the seasons, but as I look at all the new growth popping up, I get so excited!
I'm thankful for technology and the for the ability to do many things online now that up until recently meant driving somewhere or waiting on the phone or mailing things back and forth. It's pretty astounding what we can do sitting in our living room with our little laptops (and a credit card!)
I am thankful for family. We have 2 new grandchildren on the way (which will be #7 & 8 for us) and it makes me so happy that my kids want to have kids. Such a joy!
I am thankful for my job that allows for so much flexibility (prn nurse). Overall, my coworkers are great and it's a blessing to be able to care for people when they are at their worst and hopefully make their night a little more comfortable. And, I am grateful for the night shift. I know many people can't handle nights, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I'm not a great morning person, so it just works better for me.
I'm thankful for:
- Cool evening breeze, dark vast sky and brilliant stars sprinkled throughout. Wow! God is an incredible Creator!
- All my teens can do. I sure do miss the little years, but advantages do come with them getting older too.
- Blogs to read
- The Psalms, right now particularly 32, 34, and 91
My son stopped smoking 12.16.22. He quit cold turkey and now wonders why he ever took it up. He smoked for 15 years. I’m thankful he quit.
For my nutty coworkers.
For my vet who gives refills without having to bring the pups in.
For the grief counselors who check up on my family.
For our new neighbors. Very nice couple. They yell from their yard “hi neighbors”!
Kristen, I meant to comment yesterday and didn't get to it. I wanted to say CONGRATULATIONS and how encouraged I am by you. In this day and age of Instagram/influencer culture etc I really admire that you are willing and excited to put your feet on the ground and show up to help people in person.
I’m enroute to one of my kid’s college graduations for the 2nd week in a row. One master’s and one bachelor’s degree. I’m thankful we’re back to full commencement ceremonies. I’m thankful we were able to fund most of their expenses. They have loans but not too much. I’m thankful they took advantage of the opportunities and privileges they were afforded. I’m thankful that the kid who struggled with health problems was still able to enjoy her college experience AND is taking her illnesses seriously. I’m excited to see what the future holds for them and am feeling bewildered to be at this stage with 2/3 of our kids!
This week I am thankful that a lot of events I was anxiously anticipating have come and gone with only minor hiccups. I am also very close to enjoying smooth end of the year sailing at work-just a few more major tasks to complete, but so far everything is going well despite a level of exhaustion that I only previously felt when I had a newborn.
I really look forward to your emails linking me to a variety of good stuff. I rarely respond, but wanted to tell you that it took me 24 years to get a bachelors degree! What kept me going was that taking 1 class at a time, I calculated I'd be 50 by the time I finished and then I thought, "Well, I'll be 50 anyway, so why not have that degree I missed as a young person when I get there?" I am now 75, so every time I have had to indicated my level of education on a form, I feel great pride. It didn't help my career, but it sure helped by self respect. Yea! For you and all the other women who have taken nontraditional paths to self fulfillment.
@Maryanne, I finished my degree after I turned 50. I, too, love when I can check the bachelor's degree box. For years I could check the some college box, if they had it. It is so nice to be able to check the other box. I also like your comment about "I'm going to be 50 anyway, so I might as well have it." (My paraphrase).
Ahh, yes, it will be nice to be able check something other than the "some college" box on forms in the future! And good for you for hanging in there to get your degree!
I think it’s wonderful that you are going back to school. We need nurses so badly, and you will be a fantastic nurse! How do I know? You are such a good communicator, for starters. You look for the good in others ( important when you are working with grouchy people). Last, but not least, you are so diligent about your studies and learning all you can. I wish you the best of luck!
Aww, thank you. And yes, there is a terrible nursing shortage. I'm going to only make a tiny dent in the shortage, but hey, this is one less nurse they need to find.
I graduated nursing school in 1971, so I've seen many changes through the years. Here's one to knock your socks off: In the early '80s, nurses could smoke in the break rooms at hospitals--even in intensive care!
Man, that IS really wild!!
Congratulations on being accepted to nursing school.
Perhaps I'm too late to comment, but as I'm reading this late, I just have to say this: the worst thing about public smoking anywhere and everywhere was smoking in the workplace. My first job out of college was a desk job in a small room with three smokers who would talk as they were smoking and say stupid things like "sorry" as they were trying to blow their smoke over their shoulder like that would keep it away from me. I would arrive at work in the morning with hair smelling fresh and clean and leave smelling like... well you know. I was in my 30's when smoking in the workplace was prohibited and WOW--what a happy day!
@Kristen,
Belated congratulations on getting in to nursing school! I, also, had no doubt that you would get in, and I'm excited for you!
As a hospital dietitian for the past 36 years, I remember when smoking was allowed in hospitals - patients and staff alike. Yes. It was truly awful to walk into a patient's room that had a haze of smoke in it.....I'd walk out of there stinking of smoke. I absolutely hated that! So glad the hospital system where I work went 100% smoke free.
Yes to non-smoking areas, yes to cuddles from animal, and yessssss to women's rights!
This week I'm thankful for:
* I got into a car accident yesterday. My 2018 Civic is totaled 🙁 I'm thankful I have the insurances that covers a new Civic at no cost to me (or a minimal cost, not sure yet)
* I won't be able to get the new car until at least August, and we don't have a second one. So I'm thankful that my mom is willing to lend me her car for necessities, and that I have the physical capacities to ride my bike to work. It will be 2x45 min each working day, so I'll get plenty of exercice!
* I was with my daughter in the car. Very thankful that no one got hurt! My friend totaled her car a year ago in a horrific accident and she is still in constant pain to this day, so I'm not taking this lightly
* That I was able to find a 4 days cad rental just in time for the long weekend so we are able to drive the 6 hours to visit family this weekend.
* That, to start with, I have the financial means to even own a car, the knowledge required to drive it and the freedom to do so , as a woman.