I was listening to an Esther Perel podcast the other week where she was helping someone who was really stuck in a rut of framing everything in the negative.
Esther helped her think through some other ways to view her life and she said something like (and I’m paraphrasing), “This is just adding another lens, another view. You don’t have to get rid of the other one, but I’m asking you try adding a new one.”
And I liked that way of thinking; it reminded me of how I frequently say that to see our lives in a way that’s true, we need to look at the good just as much as we look at the bad/hard.
I don’t for a minute believe we need to whisk the hard out of sight; it’s there, it’s real, and it hurts.
But it’s helpful to add another view, another lens, one that also sees the true, real, wonderful good parts of life.
Here are mine!
This week, I’m thankful:
for a quiet week
Last week was busy with company/graduation, and next week I have jury duty all week.
But this week is pretty quiet and I am thankful for a minute to breathe.
that I got to walk on the rocks
I haven’t made it to the trail that goes by the water in a while, largely because of school/clinicals.
But last weekend I did, on a lovely sunny day, and my heart was happy.
that Chiquita still loves her tunnel
I got this from my Buy Nothing group several years ago and it continues to enchant Chiquita. Seriously one of my best free acquisitions!
for the beautiful flowers other people grow
The roses at the top of this post are from a walk downtown, and since I am not much of a gardener, I appreciate the effort other people put in to grow lovely things.
Also, isn’t the inside of this coneflower interesting to look at? So pleasingly tidy.
for the rain we’ve been getting
I don’t enjoy rainy days per se (as you know) but I do appreciate that they are likely making a dent in our drought conditions.
And I appreciate the results of the rain, like…a green world!
I know next time I visit the mosses on the trails, they will be a lovely green. 🙂
that my tech job is still very challenging
I’ve worked two shifts so far this week and I was thinking about how every time I go in, I still find it to be a challenging kind of work. It’s just so, so busy, which makes it hard to get everything done.
But honestly, I really do appreciate the challenge. Every shift, I feel like I get slightly better at juggling it all, and that’s satisfying.
for pictures of my grandcats
Sonia is always sending me pictures of her super fluffy cat Crouton:
His fluff levels are unmatched
And Lisey keeps me supplied with pictures of Piper:
Katja
Sunday 1st of June 2025
I am thankful for spring/summer coming. And by the way, if you like flowers, if you get your own estate and have enough space: go for rambler roses. Once set, they need next to nothing. I consider myself as a free gardener, everything that can survive and do it`s thing with little help -great.
Jill
Friday 30th of May 2025
I really appreciate this post! I come from a family of complainers and I think it is easy for me to fall down the complaining rabbit hole. Especially when I was just with some complaining family members over the weekend. But when I read your words, I realize that I just need a new lens. There is always, always something to be thankful for (without brushing away the hard or negative or bad)
JNL
Friday 30th of May 2025
I've read a number of Esther Perel's books and I find them very supportive. Thankful this week that a visit to an aunt was pleasurable and positive. That my sibling who is struggling with mental and physical health may not be well, but is well cared for. And that my other sibling and I have regained our peace again somewhat after a distressing and worried week. Thankful for our loved and loving kids, and for the growing independence and self esteem of the kid we worry most about. Thankful for the buzz of insects in our small garden. The sound of those busy creatures is a balm for the soul.
Ann
Thursday 29th of May 2025
Kristen, I *just* listened to the same episode today! I agree with you, considering the wider (and possibly more positive) view is a much more helpful frame to use. Thank you for spreading this kind of message!
I am thankful for: - the beautiful and warm sunny weather we've been getting here in the PNW - 2 interviews that went smoothly and with interviewers that were generous with their positive feedback - my mentor that has helped me grow so much in my profession as teacher - my students who are warm, receptive and make it a pleasure to be at work - for my public library system and especially the book sales that let me bring home stacks of books for a few dollars (in addition to the stacks of borrowed books!)
Ruth T
Thursday 29th of May 2025
This week I'm thankful for: * a great year of school. While we had some hard patches in the middle (both in my family and in our school), overall it was a fabulous year and I feel like it can't get better than this! (Though often when I feel like that, it eventually does. ) * for my boss taking such good care of me and my family today and always. * that I didn't cry through my sweet baby girl's entire kindergarten graduation! Ha! I've been an emotional mess for a week - two of my three kids are hitting big milestones - and I cried a bunch in the morning, but only a smidge during the actual ceremony. * that my daughter's kindergarten teacher goes to my church now so we will still see her. * for my husband and the way he cares. * that my son's teacher, speech therapist, and I were all on the same page at his IEP meeting. * that it wasn't 90 degrees for field day this year! :)