1. Give gifts to everyone you’ve ever met (or every relative you’ve got).
So what if you’ve haven’t seen or talked to Great-Aunt Sally in 15 years? Buy her a gift! Same goes for friends you hardly see. And don’t forget the mailman, the hairdresser, every neighbor, and all your children’s teachers.
2. Buy Christmas versions of everything in your home.
Everyday dishes will never work during December…you must have a snowman or Santa set. Same goes for towels, nightlights, cups, mugs, and even picture frames.
All the things must be sparkly! and red! and green!
As an added bonus, these Christmas versions of everything will clutter up your home 11 months of the year. Suh-weet.
3. Buy all your gifts new.
So what if you could get twice the Duplos for half the price by buying them on Ebay? Get thee to a store where you can pay full price!
4. Don’t make any gifts.
Only factory-produced items should dwell under your tree.
5. Wrap everything in disposable, fancy wrapping paper.
Everyone knows reusable wrapping is ugly anyway.
6. Never let someone else outspend you.
That would be embarrassing. Better to charge a gift than to be bested by someone else, so don’t worry about whether you can afford it.
7. Don’t save any money before December rolls around.
Just spend the money you were going to use to pay your mortgage or utility bill. You can always be a little late on the January bills.
8. Buy brand-new holiday outfits for the whole family.
So what if you’re the same size you were last year? That dress is so 2010. You need a new one. With shoes to match.
And don’t shop for kids’ holiday clothes second-hand. It’s not like the stores are flooded with fancy little girl dresses or anything.
9. Get your priorities in order: 1. Stuff. 2. Shopping. 3. Experiences.
You don’t have time to bake cookies or decorate the tree with your kids…the mall is calling!
10. You pick! What advice would you put in slot 10?
Today’s 365 post: Too many bananas
Joshua’s 365 post: A Preview of Our Christmas Lights