Monday Q&A | Do I feel overwhelmed? plus photography sessions and produce bags
Every Monday, I answer a few of the questions that my readers send me. If you have a question you'd like me to answer in a future Q&A post, just leave me a comment here or email me (thefrugalgirl [at] gmail [dot] com) and put Q&A in the subject line. I look forward to hearing from you!
I am a newbie homeschooler (I've been doing it P/T while they are in preschool, but am starting full-time in the fall with Kindergarten!) and am wondering how you manage HS with all of your other jobs – piano lessons, photography, planning groceries/savings, baking batches, blogging, etc.!!! You seem to have it all together, but don't you feel overwhelmed sometimes? There are so many days that I go to bed just giving up on my to-do list and it waits for me again in the morning! (I teach piano 2 days week, and my children are 1, 3, & 5)
-Georgia
I think I've answered a question sort of similar to this in a previous Q&A, but I think it probably bears repeating:
Yes, yes, yes, I sometimes feel overwhelmed. And no, no, no, I do not have it all together!
In the past, I've been able to manage homeschooling and all my other responsibilities pretty well, but this past year has been a little different (Sonia started school in the fall, so now I'm homeschooling 3 kids). In all my years of homeschooling, I have never, ever been so anxious for summer to arrive as I was this year, and I'm feeling like I may need to do some scaling back or reorganizing before school starts up again in the fall. Depending on how things go with my husband's job, this may take the form of cutting back my piano teaching to an even more minimal level. Or, it may be that I just need to come up with a better organized plan of attack.
So yeah...I certainly haven't got all of this down pat!
Something I've been pondering lately is how easy it is for a blogger to come across as perfect and together without even meaning to. It's really, really easy for me to forget that you all don't see the stuff that I don't post on my blog...since I see my piles of laundry and dirty children and messy rooms, and since I obviously know when I'm feeling exhausted and out of patience, I forget that you don't. I do try to share my failures and faults (I do this more often on Facebook or Twitter than I do on my blog), but I think I'm not doing as well with that as I could.
So, from here on out, I'm going to try to be a little more intentional about letting you have a better view of the imperfections in my life. The last thing in the world I want to do is to make you think that I'm a perfect, has-it-all-together mom/wife because that's simply not the case.
Worry not, though...I'm not going to turn my blog into a depressing whine-fest! That's just not how I roll, and it wouldn't quite go with that whole "cheerfully living on less" thing I've got going on.
Anyhow, I definitely don't have the corner on organization/balance/time management, but because so many of you have asked, I am really, really hoping to be able to put together a series on productivity this summer (because I have more free time when I'm not homeschooling). Hopefully that will answer some of your questions.
How do you do photography sessions (& any editing) with your children? Do you schedule them when your husband is home, do they go with you, or do they stay with friends/family?
-Georgia
That really depends. If the session is close to home, and my clients (that sounds ridiculously formal, but I don't know what else to call people I take pictures of!) are amenable to the idea, I do take them with me. They're all old enough to generally behave themselves long enough for me to take pictures, and I often bring some snacks or something to keep the occupied while I'm shooting.
If my husband happens to be home when I'm doing a shoot, then of course I leave the kids at home with him. I don't terribly mind having them along on a shoot, but given the choice, I definitely prefer to leave them home!
Sometimes, I manage to leave them with someone else when my husband isn't available, though. For instance, on Saturday, I did an engagement shoot for my cousin and her fiance (who may very well be one of the cutest couples ever to grace the face of this earth! See?).
(you can see more of them on my photo blog if you want.)
Since my husband was at work while we did the shoot, I left my kids with my aunt and cousins while I went downtown to do the shoot, which worked out great...my kids were thrilled to pieces, and I was able to work undistracted.
Editing time is a little bit trickier to carve out, and as my, um, clients know, it usually takes me a couple of weeks to get all the pictures sorted and edited. I usually do editing bit by bit, with random bits of time I manage to find.
I don't do tons of photo sessions because I find when I do, it starts to not be all that much fun anymore, mostly because I have to spend so much time editing. If I wasn't already mothering 4 children, homeschooling, cooking, blogging, cleaning, and doing a bunch of other things, I might feel differently, of course. But as it is, a session here and there is just perfect for me...enough to keep my feet wet and to keep me challenged, but not so much that I feel overwhelmed.
Perhaps as my kids get older and more independent, I'll get into doing photo sessions more seriously, but for now photography is having to take a back seat to a lot of other things in my life. And that's ok, because my kids are only going to be little once.
Recently, I've taken over the grocery shopping, menu planning and cooking in my household. I don't mind it but the annoying little plastic produce bags always bother me! I use cloth bags for all of my groceries but I still end up with so many of those produce bags and I just throw them away, and that can't be very environmentally-friendly. I noticed that in your grocery pictures you don't have plastic bags around your produce, do you purchase the fruit without bags or take them off later? Is it possible to purchase without bags?
-Mandy
Most of the time, I do try to purchase my produce without using plastic bags. Aldi has a lot of their produce pre-packaged and they don't offer bags with their loose produce, but when I'm shopping at Weis, I forego the bag whenever possible.
This does make it a little bit trickier at checkout (especially when I'm buying things like loose mushrooms!), so most of the time I opt to use the self checkout. That way I don't annoy the poor cashier with my loose produce and cloth bags.
I guess this might seem a little bit unsanitary to some, but I'm not at all a germophobe, and I'd be kidding myself to think that my produce hasn't been touched by a bunch of hands before it even makes it to the grocery store display.
And besides, I wash our produce before we eat it!
If you really can't stomach the idea of leaving your produce bare, you could buy or make some drawstring mesh bags to use instead. These Acme bags are $4, but I'm thinking some of those mesh laundry bags (for lingerie) would work as well and would be cheaper.
Readers, what do you do to avoid the ubiquitous produce bag?
Do you have a designated place for homeschooling, like a special room for it, or do you do it at the kitchen table type of thing? I went to one lady's house that homeschooled and she had a little "classroom" in her house, desks and all.
As far as the produce bags are concerned, I'm not a germophobe, however, having BEEN a cashier for over 8 years, I still use produce bags because of drippy chicken, seafood, etc. For me, its a cross contamination sort of thing, not so much the hands that touch it. What I've taken to doing is not laying it on the belt at all and just handing it to the cashier to be weighed and handed back to me to be put in the bag.
You could make your own tulle or netting bags if you have a sewing machine. I can't see paying $4 for a net bag though I don't think $4 is too much for the time spent making the bag.
But the most frugal way is to save your produce bags from each trip. Let them dry and stuff them into one of your cloth bags for reuse. You're going to wash the veggies anyway. Big produce (oranges, grapefruit, red onions, etc.) can be purchased without bags but I can't see doing mushrooms that way--we love mushrooms and buy pounds of them.
Mandy-
You don't have to toss out the produce bags you get at the grocery store. I own a dog so I'm always needing pooper scooper bags. When I took her to obediance school they collected bags there to use there and at animal shelters. I also took it upon myself to install a container for bags in my neighborhood park and any extras I have I leave there for other people to use. The bags still end up in the land fill but at least they get used twice before going there and I'm not buying bags specifically to use for poop.
When I do end up with a plastic produce bag (or the bag from a stack of tortillas, or the inner plastic bag from a box of cereal, etc.) I re-use it multiple times:
First, to store something else in (leftover bread, etc.), then...
Second, to line the stainless steel canister that sits next to our kitchen sink as a compost receptacle, and finally...
Third, after dumping the compost from the kitchen into the larger compost bin outside, I pick up dog poop from the backyard with the bag.
I bought a set of "Flip & Tumble" re-usable produce bags from http://www.reusablebags.com (5 bags for $10.95) and LOVE THEM! I am about to order another set; they are AWESOME and have cut my need to grab plastic produce bags at the store tremendously.
I found some super cheap mesh lingerie bags at a dollar store, I think they were 50cents each. They work super good for just about anything, and I use them for loose items like mushrooms and herbs too. I try not to buy produce at ALDI just because its all packaged in plastic, and we are very determined to reduce our plastic consumption.
The bags don't weigh that much so I don't worry at the cash register, and they are easy for the cashier to see through for the item number. I also have some linen bags that I use for bluk flours and small stuff, like nuts and grains. I put the food right into my storage containers as soon as I get home, and those bags go through the wash before I use them again.
Georgia, I just finished my first year of homeschooling, and wanted to mention that, even homeschooling full-time is going to take a lot less time than you'd think, and certainly way less than a typical school day. In the fall I was teaching two writing classes, so I was out of the house from 8-11 two mornings a week. We had started my son off in a charter school, and then decided to homeschool in October, and honestly things were easier, smoother, and less overwhelming when we started homeschooling.
When we first started homeschooling, I was thinking, "I'm a really educationally-oriented person, I want to make sure I give my son a good education, so we'll probably spend 4 hours or so a day doing school." I was SO off. Even on days when we did tons of activities, we didn't come close to that. I now schedule from 10:30-12:00 for school, and honestly we probably only fill the whole 90 minutes about half the time. And, my son is working above grade level. When you only have one student and are working at their pace, and don't need to fill time with busy work or spend time getting 30 kids settled in from one activity to another, you can cover a lot in a short period of time.
Which is all to say, as I think Kristen has mentioned in the past, that homeschooling takes a lot fewer hours each day than conventional classroom schooling. Not that having little kids isn't overwhelming no matter how you school them or what you do with them, but hopefully you'll find that homeschooling kindy is pretty easy to work into your schedule.
I severely cut back on my use of plastic produce bags about a month ago. Thus far, no one at the checkout line has complained. I just make sure that all the like produce is grouped together on the belt.
I re-use my produce bags multiple times. I use them for baked goods. It saves the cost of buying bags for the baked goods and puts all those produce bags to work. And by using them for baked goods they can be re-used many, many times before retiring them.
We use our produce bags over and over (well, except when we use them for pet waste!). I keep an old (but attractive!) tissue box cover on the kitchen sink and stuff the extra bags in it from the bottom, and then pull one out from the top as we need them. We wash and reuse bags as much as possible though, and I try and remember to take some along when I go shopping, but haven't been too successful remembering to do that.
I try to avoid taking plastic bags as much as possible when I'm buying produce, but haven't come up with a solution yet when purchasing bulk foods other than to use the plastic bags provided. I know I could bring my own containers, but the hassle of weighing them, asking the checker to subtract the weight, etc. doesn't seem worth the hassle yet for the amount of different bulk foods I typically purchase on each shopping trip.
I love the pictures from your photo session ... were they taken at USNA? I thought I recognized the background.
Yep, her fiance is a marine, so we trekked out to the academy for the session. It's not nearly as convenient as shooting near my house, but my goodness! The beautiful background options there are nearly endless. I think I'll have to drag some future clients there. lol
I have a question about homeschooling; coming from a non-homeschooling background. Even with an assortment of materials & resources, how do you feel confident that you know "enough" about a subject to teach your kids? I know that question can seem snotty, but I'm truly not trying to be. I have a BS & a MS in mathematics education & taught high school math for several years. So, from my perspective, I don't think I could ever have a proper knowledge base in all the fields & sub-fields of English, math, science, social science, art, etc. to do a proper job of thoroughly educating my children. I'm not confident that I could do a better job than people who have made it their life's work to study & teach a particular subject area.
I fully acknowledge, of course, that as a parent, I am my children's number one teacher & have a bigger impact on my child's life than anyone else. We do talk about & explore language & math & science & all those other things, but I don't think I can replace well-qualified teachers.
Not Kristen ;), but I just wanted to reply to this. I'm coming at it from the "opposite" direction: I teach college English and have a background in composition and literacy education. I don't have much background in math, beyond the courses I took in high school and college. But, honestly, either do most elementary school teachers. It's not like your average elementary school teacher is or could be an expert on either every subject they teach or on how to teach every subject.
My son's only six right now. I'm not sure how long we'll homeschool for (our decision to homeschool was largely practical, not ideological--we live in Detroit right now and the public schools are atrocious while the private schools are too expensive), but if we did continue to homeschool up past where I was comfortable with the material, I'd enroll him in classes for those subjects. I know I couldn't teach calculus, for example, since it's been 15 years since I've done it and I barely understood it then, so I'd get him into a class at a local high school or community college.
Plus, at least in the lower elementary school years, I think fostering a love of and excitement about learning is more important than any specific content knowledge.
I think most parents can teach the basics. My mom was an English major and she homeschooled me through high school. I took 6 math classes (precalc1, precalc2, calc1, calc2, calc3, and diffy q) and science classes (chemistry and physics) at a community college during high school. I ended up in college with a dual degree in physics and mechanical engineering. And my GPA was high enough that they let me into grad school for free and actually paid me to go. I earned my masters in mechanical engineering in a year (because I wanted to come home and get married to my best friend). My next sister graduated with her accounting degree and my next sister is earning her nursing degree right now. She already has a paralegal degree.
I say all this to say, I think most parents, especially well educated ones, can teach the basics of any subject. My mom did a wonderful job and now I love english almost as much as math. I really didn't do any REAL science until my high school community college classes. We did a lot of reading growing up. Science was picking a book out the of science section, doing an experiment from it, and writing book reports. We also visited museums. I liked homeschooling because it was tailored to specific needs. I didn't have to sit still for 8 hours a day.
Plus, there are so many home schooling families now. It is easy to swap classes or learn something as a group. We did writing club growing up and had to write a paper a week and read it in front of people. That taught me public speaking wasn't so scary. My brother took Biology with a group of 6 - 8th grade homeschoolers that one of the other moms taught. She also teaches chemistry sometimes.
It is flexible. I enjoyed it. I hope to homeschool my children someday.
without getting personal...does the child decide on going to public school or is it for educational reasons?(1 out of 4)...just a question...no judgements....
The Dollar Tree sells mesh-type bags in the car care section. They are super lightweight and have a drawstring at the top. Perfect for produce. No more plastic for me -- of course, I have to remember to bring them into the store!
I did a post about it awhile ago -- it includes a picture so you know what to look for:
http://www.frugallivingnw.com/uncategorized/the-perfect-reusable-produce-bag/
I use these also, along with some sturdier ones I have crocheted for heavy things like apples and potatoes. They may be able to withstand the heavy stuff but I didn't want to risk it!
I wish stores would have a sign in the parking lot : TAKE YOUR CLOTH BAGS OUT OF THE VAN, SANDY. This would make my life easier ;D
Actually most of the stores in my area (central NJ) have a sign just like that. Ok well it doesn't say "Sandy" but it says something along the lines of "Don't forget your reusable shopping bags!"
I have started putting my purse in the trunk where my reusable bags are when going out. So I have to open the trunk to get my purse and , OH, there are my bags! Not foolproof, but MUCH better on taking those bags.
I found directions to make some produce bags on another blog and I've used them for just over a year. I bought some really fine tulle and made an appropriately sized bag and put in a drawstring. They're washable and reusable.
Hey Kristen, I totally hear you about looking "perfect" in our blogs. The difference between you and I is I WANT my readers to think I'm perfect!:P (Just kidding...Sort of)
I made my own produce bags out of an old sheer shower curtain. The directions are here. They're also good for bulk bins like the kind you'd find at a Whole Foods or other natural foods store, and especially at the farmers market.
i am looking VERY forward to your post on productivity. I don't homeschool yet, but I see it in our future. The area I struggle with the most in regards to productivity is blogging.
And I totally get the appearing perfect thing. I think it is hard to get across on blogs that we aren't perfect because a niche blog such as this is there to encourage and teach. My current blog is really about nothing. I'm quick to confess my imperfections. However, I think some people view that wrongly too because they think that I'm confident in my flaws, which I'm not! lol
I never thought I struggled with perfectionism. However, recently I realized that I do. Basically , because I have been working on a "frugal" blog and creating a workshop on grocery savings for months. And I'm no where near ready to do either. Why? Because I know I'm not perfect at it and I know that others are so much better. So, I feel that I shouldnt' do it at all. Which I know is wrong because I have felt that God has specifically told me to walk forward with these things:)
Wow...that went on for awhile! Sorry about taking over your blog! lol
I have seen reusable produce bags--made of netting--sold on Etsy and other Web sites; I am seriously considering purchasing some. I like the idea from another poster who noted that lingerie bags (especially if you can find them super cheap!) would be great for this purpose.
Great ideas for produce bags! I was just beginning to look into this and will be checking out the dollar store today.
A few folks talked about forgetting their shopping bags - I have two bags that fold up into themselves - the key is that they are a good quality nylon, so they are very thin and they fold up very small (each is smaller than my fist) I always carry these in my purse - they are extremely lightweight and really don't take up much space. This was absolutely key in converting me into a Reusable Bag Owner. I never could remember to bring in canvas bags into the store!
Here is one of the cheapest ones I have found ($8.99/bag), as they can be pricey elsewhere: http://www.containerstore.com/shop/travel/reusableBags?Ntt=shopping+bags&productId=10023849
And now, I am off to hunt for produce bags. Thanks!
I had to reply when I read that the cheapest foldable bags you found are $8.99! I searched on ebay a while ago and found some really cute bags. While they are folded up they look like a strawberry (actually there are a few shapes. I've seen grapes and watermelons too). Cute and super cheap!
I'm sorry, I don't know how to embed links.
http://cgi.ebay.com/Strawberry-Eco-Cute-Reusable-Tote-Shoulder-Shopping-Bag-/230482465515?cmd=ViewItem&pt=US_CSA_WH_Handbags&hash=item35a9d352eb
I use the above mentioned bags from the dollar tree, but I have crocheted several others, for myself and other people. If you crochet, there are lots of patterns online for these types of bags. You make them out of crochet thread and they are lightweight. There may be knit patterns, but I don't knit so I am not familiar with that. You can also sew them. If you know anyone getting married who may have some tulle, you could get the material for free if you asked I bet...well, after the wedding is over. ;o) I rarely use the plastic bags anymore, though I will still put them around meat if it looks as though it may leak, but I don't buy much meat anymore so it's not much of a problem.
Try saving the mesh bags that produce is packaged in - usually oranges and onions come in mesh bags that can be used again and again. They also work very well as dish scrubbers!
I reuse the store's produce bags. Eventually they get thrown out or recycled but it's a start. Ones used for produce don't need washing, just dried before being put away. Ones used for meat I throw out, as meat drippings aren't recyclable. Sometimes I forget to bring them (for reasons irrelevant to this post, they don't live in the same place as my reusable bags) so they tend to accumulate. When I get too many I give a bunch to my CSA growers who use them to bag the produce they give out.
Kristen, about homeschooling: can you teach less each day and extend the school year? That could lighten you daily burden.
I just reuse the plastic bags until they are unusable. Basically, when they get holes. Not as good as something that isn't plastic, or not using bags at all, but still better than getting new bags everytime I go in the store. My husband doesn't particularly like it, but hey, I do the shopping. I just keep my reusable grocery bags on a hook by the back door. And when I empty out a plastic veggie bag I just go stuff it in the top of the groceries bag. When I go shopping I grab the whole bit. And when we do a Farmer's Market in the summer I have the plastic bags to use there. Works for me!