Ask the readers: How do you socialize frugally?
Alright, frugal people! I got an email from a reader that I will do my best to answer, and then I'd love your input as well because I think you all will have a lot to add.
The email:
Hello!
A blog reader for many years wondering your thoughts on a frugal topic: What types of things (other than going for a walk/hike or having dinner at home together) do you do with your girlfriends that’s frugal?
I’m an extrovert - so quite social but everything everyone wants to do involves spending. Most friends love to shop (I don’t, unless it’s browsing a book store) or they want to go get a mani/pedi (not my money priority) or the movies …
The thing is, I make decent money so I really don’t have a reason (friends would think) to say no - but so many of their choices involve spending on things I don’t value spending money on.
Other than visiting at home and going for walks - what do you do with friends?
I do go out for dinners……
Thoughts? 
I am perhaps not the best person to answer this question because when I hang out with people, I really do not care what we do, as long as it's not something where I am in abject misery.
Basically, as long as it's not something I hate doing, I'm happy just to be around the people that I love.
This is good in a sense because I'm pretty flexible about what we do. But it also means I am not a veritable font of Super Fun and Exciting Things To Do With Friends.
In fact, when Mr. FG and I were dating, we'd often spend time running errands together, like grocery shopping or going to the bank, and my older brother sarcastically dubbed us, "The Fun Couple". Ha.
So, I'm just saying, take my list with a grain of salt, and then check the comments for ideas from other people who are more Fun and Exciting.
1. Try some new activities at home together
Maybe at-home hangouts would be more interesting if you tried some things other than just having dinner.
For example, we've had lots of fun carving pumpkins with friends or decorating Christmas cookies together.
Or what about an easy sewing project? Sonia and Zoe had fun making holiday pajama pants with their cousin.
2. Make dinner at home a little different
Could you do a themed night? (the theme could be food or dress)
Could you pick a vintage menu and recreate it? Sonia has a 1950s menu she wants to make and invite friends over for, but it also might be hilarious to pick 1960s or 1970s recipes to make. And if they are all disgusting, you could order pizza after sampling them.
Could you do a tea party? Or a potluck brunch meal where everyone wears their pajamas?
3. Volunteer together
Not every friend group will be up for this, but I've found that volunteering with other people is a great way to find friends and strengthen relationships. Plus, you're making the world a better place while also hanging out with people that you love...a win-win!
You could volunteer at a food pantry, take a shift together at a dog/cat adoption center, help out at a community event, or bake together for a fundraiser.
I don't know where you live, of course, but I bet there are volunteer opportunities if you look.
4. Look for a discount on a class or an adventure
If you are in America, you could check deal voucher sites, such as Groupon, for a discounted voucher for fun things to do.
Mr. FG and I got one for a glass-blowing class, and I know I've seen a zillion other entertainment vouchers on there as well.
You might look into a pottery-painting class, a soap/candle-making class, or maybe a cooking class.
5. Look for free activities in your area
Is there a book club you could join? A concert-in-the-park series? Free parks where you could picnic? Free museums to visit?
6. Consider a membership to a favorite spot
If there is a park, pool, aquarium, museum, concert hall, zoo, or something else that you all would love to go regularly, you could agree to buy a membership. As long as you know you'd be there all the time, it could be worth the money.
And this last one is not a tip, exactly:
Think about what you do value spending money on, and communicate that to your friends
You know that movies and mani-pedis aren't your thing, but I bet you know what you do like spending money on. Is there a way that you could incorporate that into your social time? And could you communicate that to your friends and initiate some hang-outs that reflect your money priorities?
My best friend and I will plan Target/grocery shopping/chores together. Doing things we have to get done but getting to spend time together and talk. Two birds and one stone. Good luck!
@Kelly, good tip!! I went once with my mother and sister in laws to get haircuts. We all wanted to get it done and we made a memory doing it together.
Excellent suggestions, Kristen! I'd add attending events that matter to one or more of you. One of my friends is a drummer for several local bands; whenever his band would play at a coffee shop, a group of us (who aren't bar people, hence the importance of the coffee shop) would go hear him play. This only cost the price of a beverage if one chose but still made for an enjoyable, inexpensive evening.
If any of your friends are artists or enjoy art, suggest attending shows (First Fridays are big around here) and make sure to make one of their personal shows if you can. Wineries in our area often offer free music and let you bring your own picnic to enjoy while you listen. Like the coffee shop, the winery expects to pay its way through drink sales, but since I don't drink, it's cheap, indeed, to enjoy my friends' company! 😛
So far as at home activities, our friend group also likes to do movie and dinner nights. Sometimes, we're having such a good time over dinner that we don't even get to the movie! We had a "Slumber Party"theme where everyone stayed overnight at the host's house (his suggestion, since we often laughed ourselves into the wee hours), arrived in our pajamas, and brought appropriate foods: Chicken nuggets, cinnamon rolls, and so on. Since we're all in our mid-to-late 30s, the silliness of it all just made it more fun! We also did a pizza bar (hosts provided naan to use as crusts, everyone else brought ingredients), breakfast for dinner, Crock Pot theme for a rainy weekend--you get the idea!
@N, Great suggestions and ideas!!
@N, with all due respect, if you're at an establishment, you need to purchase something. I don't drink either, and think it's ridiculous to pay a cover charge for all you can drink, but would nurse a mocktail or soda.
@Meredith, I honestly hadn’t thought of mocktails! That’s a good idea for next time, thank you. As the resident teetotaler, I default to water without thinking to check for other, non-soda options. Again, thank you!
Here are some suggestions:
1) happy hour: I suggest checking out the happy hour menu in advance. It's fun and not too expensive.
2) craft night at someone's home: if you all knit then make it knitting night. Ask people to bring a small appetizer or drink to share.
3) if it's around a holiday like Christmas do a cookie exchange.
4) make your own pizza night. Provide pre-made pizza dough... enough so that everyone can make their own personal pizza. Have everyone bring their favorite topping to share.
@Alicia, love these!
All of these are fantastic!
I would also like to add: I don't mind accompanying my friends on activities they enjoy that I don't. For example, I don't like wearing nail polish, but I'll happily with with a friend while she gets a mani (not possible right now where I live, but was in the Before Times) and just chat.
We do a Game Night at our house with some friends which has been super fun! They come over (or we go to their house), we have dinner, then we send all our kids downstairs to play while the adults play a board or card game. It's been such a great way to socialize, especially earlier this year when almost everything was locked down in our area.
In the Before Times, when I was getting together with female friends more frequently, another thing we would do was a book club (rotating who hosts) or a housework club (rotating whose house we were at - the host would come up with a list of tasks she wanted to tackle, and we would all pitch in. Those who were physically unable to do the task would bring a snack for the workers and just sit and socialize while people worked!).
That housework club only got a few months of effort before Covid shut everything down, but it's something I'm working on getting started again! It was so helpful to have people who are much better at housecleaning or decorating or whatever than I am come over, and it was such a gift to be able to share my gardening experience and sheer physical strength for some outdoor projects!
@EngineerMom, the Housework Club is a great idea, and you've made it open to all, too. I'm going to have to see if I can do that. Right now we tend to help whomever is moving or renovating.
@EngineerMom,
The housework club is a great idea! I have helped friends clean out their garages, paint, lay mulch, organize closets and sew throw pillows. This is especially helpful for my older friends who need a helping hand and my friends who have little free time.
@EngineerMom, Game night is a GREAT idea!
I agree with Kelly! My best friend and I take whatever opportunities we can get to hang out and that includes running errands. Often times a target trip and a coffee are way better than mani/pedi days. We also like to get together with our kids and husbands and plan family dinners, alternating who hosts each time. The kids love the extra time and us adults get to hang out without paying $$$ for a sitter. We love at home crafts, decorating Christmas cookies and doing egg hunts. It’s much more fun and relaxed at home and makes for great memories.
Well, I don't exactly have any friends anymore so I can't exactly speak for myself. 😛
My wife and her friends will meet up at a park or a free or low cost event and all the kids will play together. Sometimes they go out to local events like fairs or such things.
Back in my younger days I would invite people over to play video games together or have backyard cookouts.
We joined a wine club!
We have several local wineries and one in particular has awesome benefits for club members, including unlimited free wine tastings with up to 4 guests. It is so fun to be able to invite friends for wine tasting (or discounted lunches) and then have a picnic on the beautiful grounds.
We won’t stay club members forever, but right now while we aren’t as comfortable having friends into our home, this is perfect.
Simply take the lead! Suggest stuff that fits within your budget, look for discount days, services, times, etc. Just say no if it feels like too much of a splurge. Also outdoor activities you've already budgeted for are always great - hikes, skiing, swimming, etc.
My friends and I throw pot luck parties. The host decides a theme and they normally contribute a main dish. Everyone invited brings either a dish or something like paper plates or silverware. It's always bring your own thing to drink if it's special. The host normally has water or iced tea available. It's great for families with kids. As they can try new foods and see their friends too.
Along the same lines as getting a membership somewhere, a lot of public libraries offer free or discounted passes to museums/historical sites/state parks, etc. When we moved a few years ago, I looked into all the discounts available and started researching which places we'd most like to visit!
Great ideas! I know some areas have a "free day" once a month at a zoo or art museum that people can attend. If there are any festivals or flea markets, that may be an option. Oktoberfest will be in full force around the country as well as holiday shows and markets. Many of them are free to the public.
Such a great list, Kristen!
I'd add to check for free library events - even if it's not your library! So many libraries offer free crafting nights, demos, concerts, movie nights, etc. and you usually don't even have to be part of that library's district to participate.
In the last state we lived in, our friends went out to eat every Sunday after church. We've never been go-out-to-eat-every-week people, but since we could afford it at the time we considered it an investment in those relationships and joined in. I'm so thankful we did.
Kudos for being willing to suggest new ideas to your friends!!
My friends and I do nearby touristy things - festivals, state historic sites, themed driving tours. We have a blast!
One of my dear friends loves going to breweries with me. We sample a beer or two and there's almost always a food truck 🙂 We are lucky to live in a neighborhood with several breweries in walking distance.
My closest friend and I always go to yard sales together. We always find a great bargain or two, and then we have an inexpensive lunch or dinner together.
I think it depends, in part, on whether you want to spend time with your friends, or spend time doing things with your friends.
1) Spend time with friends.
This requires finding ways to sit together, more or less, which is why meals and drinks are so common for this. You could also go to a garden, have a picnic or BBQ (some public parks have BBQs for use), use a firepit together, sit by the poolside or beach together.
2) Spend time doing things with friends.
This requires looking for inexpensive things to do with friends. Anything that one of you has a membership to is probably on the list, as are free museum days, phone-based walking tours, virtual museum visits, possibly lectures, playing frisbee/football/badmitton/toss/etc. together, and so on.
One final thought: you are assessing the things done with friends by how you value the event itself. Another way to look at it is to think of them as spending time with your friends which happens to involve doing the things. So rather than thinking "I don't want a manicure so I'm going with my friends," you could think "I want to see my friends so I'll get a manicure." You could also have a budget for that.
@WilliamB, Another idea: cookie decorating, which can be done outside if the weather cooperates.
@WilliamB,
What he said.
Plus you don't want to get the reputation of being the cheap friend who is only up for doing free things. I LIKE mani pedis and it's way more fun with a friend. And it doesn't cost much, either.
Friendship is about give and take and sometimes you need to do things that wouldn't necessarily be your first choice.
Totally agree with this last part here...I think a combo of give and take is good here. Like, sometimes you suggest a frugal thing that matters to you, and sometimes you do the non-frugal thing that matters to the friend.
So many great ideas in the comments - I love the idea of a housework party, many hands make light work. Other ideas - a Christmas tree decorating party or ornament exchange party, going thrift store or vintage store shopping, or doing a little road trip to a town nearby, especially one with a walkable downtown with outdoor art, cute shops for window-shopping. Finally, going to dinner tends to be more expensive than going out to lunch or breakfast (or just going for coffee or ice cream) - that’s a more frugal way to enjoy a meal out.
Well, this first suggestion is not exactly frugal...but...we have a hot tub and that's a really fun way to socialize. My friends love to come over and use the hot tub and chat! It doesn't cost anything (I mean, it cost plenty to get the hot tub originally, but now it's something we love having and doesn't incur much additional cost over time)
Other ideas:
Go for a walk in a pretty natural area
Get coffee from a coffee shop, then enjoy it in a park and bring homemade goodies to share
Check your library for passes...maybe there is a museum that would be fun to visit with a friend
Visit a Farmer's Market, fun to see everything and no need to buy
Have a camp fire or firepit...BYOB and provide some s'mores fixings
Book exchange or clothing exchange are fun
@Ann, I second the suggestion to check for library passes! I don't believe I've ever paid full price to visit museums in my area thanks to our library.
We also have a number of National Historic Parks in my area that have free events and programming.
Be the servers at a friend event. My friends and I provided the labor for another friend's sister's wedding lunch. We went to the friend's house and did all the table setting, food dishing up, etc. just before the wedding party arrived.
Have a board game night or play cards. Play horseshoes or cornhole in nice weather.
We have some friends we golf with...twilight hours at public courses aren't too expensive, or even just going to the putting green for an hour then maybe happy hour drinks. We have other friends we go on bike rides with, usually on a nice paved path or around a local park. Others we have over for game nights. Trivia nights are popular here. While most are at bars or brew houses, you can have soda or water if that is your thing. As others have mentioned, picnics at a park are inexpensive, even if you choose to buy sandwiches or teriyaki Tae out. We have access to Frisbee golf locally for a small cost and kayak or paddleboard rentals at a local lake are reasonable for an hour. Groupon/Living social can be a great source for discounted date ideas. Book clubs are popular too, and like "girls nights", they can be rotated with the host providing the main dish. My girls and I love to do craft days where we catch up,, enjoy being with each other and go home with holiday crafts or gifts as a bonus. Another fun idea for a group of friends is a traveling dinner: start at one house for an appetizer and at each subsequent house have another part of a meal, ending with dessert at the final destination. That can take an entire evening and not cost anyone too much.
I am not social at all because my job requires constant human contact and I toast by the time I get home every day. My husband works from home and he is our social planning person. We do run errands together. He also plans our vacations and what to do when company visits. Much of what we do, since things have eased a bit with the pandemic, involves a meal out, since we all have to eat and there are things I just can't cook well at home, like steak or Asian food.
Well I think Kristen's suggestions are great! 🙂 Another one I have is to check your local library and rec center for free or cheap events. My friends and I have done escape rooms at local libraries, signed up for free classes, and gone to free yoga in the park. We've also brought our own food to a central location and just sat around and talked.
As a confirmed introvert, I don't plan many occasions to go do something with friends, other than antique/thrift store looking (we rarely buy anything so I can't really call it shopping) or a simple meal, and those don't happen often.
My daughter, however, is an extrovert, so she's always doing things with friends. A lot of what she does with friends is listed here in the comments already.
Other things she and her friends do:
Tailgate. It is absolutely not necessary to buy a ticket and attend the game. Eat and listen to the game on the radio or internet in the stadium parking or at home.
Sitting around a fire making s'mores and talking, assuming one lives where an outdoor fire is possible. Adult beverages are optional.
Clothes swaps.
A real, formal Dinner, in dressy clothes and with a formal menu (menu items provided by all).
This last one isn't one she does, but I saw it on TV once, and thought it was a pretty good idea - for those with household projects or yard projects that would be a lot easier and faster with help: have project weekends, with each person getting a turn at getting help with a project. For example, one weekend in one month is for weeding and mulching a flower garden at Friend 1's place, next month is repainting a cleared out room at Friend 2's place, that sort of thing. The person receiving help is responsible for providing the supplies and a meal.
I just recently started buying escape rooms, puzzles, or mind games for my friends! Some offer a monthly subscription, and while (yes) it is an extra cost... often you can pass these on to someone else or...just count it as something the group does. You cover the costs of this, someone else brings wine, someone else makes a homemade pasta, someone brings a salad... And then you toss out the kiddos and significant others so it's just your friends together 🙂
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I'm not affiliated with any of these.. but I have bought How To Hunt A Killer and Finders Seekers for friends before!
Find some DVDs from your parents or watch movies at home on Netflix, etc. With cheap snacks and have card/board games! If you have the ingredients, make dinner or bake together 🙂
This coming from a broke college mom with spending problems
Your comment about your brother calling you guys the fun couple for running errands on your dates reminded me of a time we went to my husband's family reunion. At the end of one day, the adults came to us and said they were going bar hopping so we could watch the kids while they were gone. I protested, asking what made them think we would not want to go with the other adults. My husband's brother said, "Your idea of a fun night is having friends over to read plays out loud. We just don't see you bar hopping." They were right, neither my husband or I like the taste of alcohol or how people get after a few drinks, but it still stung to think the entire family thought we were bores.
My husband and I are hermits. He sings with a barbershop group, that is about the extent of his socializing with someone other than me. I have one friend who comes over every two or three months and we spend the day baking cookies for the soup line. We end the day by delivering 12 to 15 dozen cookies for them to put in the bag lunches they hand out each day.
I have a collection of World War II British cookbooks and every so often we have another couple over for a meal from that era. Sometimes we dress up in clothing from that era.
We have a few friends who like plays so about twice a year we gather and take parts and read through a play, acting it out. Sometimes we can get enough copies form the library, but other times we have to purchase them.
That is about it, we are not big socializers.
@Lindsey,
Some things we have done…
Game night pot luck with friends
Trip to a local park, bring a picnic
Go for a hike
Murder mystery game with friends
Progressive dinner with friends
Explore a new area
Have a rotating supper club
Have a themed dinner
Have a bowling night where you incorporate fun rules into the game like blind folded, opposite hand, speed bowling etc.
Try a new recipe cooking with friends
@Lindsey, singing/plays/historical cooking/volunteer baking - sounds very interesting and fun to me, not boring at all! I love the idea of spending time with a friend making cookies for a soup line.
For the questioner - I second the idea of spending time with friends volunteering - there are so many options of type of activity, length of time needed, etc.; it could be fun to find something your friends and you enjoy together!
Our family is HUGELY into board games. We play together all the time. We also are big into inviting everyone for supper, going on walks, tackling projects together, and the like. I happily have friends with like interests and we volunteer together. I had friends that were big into money-spending events... we slowly drifted apart and I don't miss it. I'll take board games any day!
When my NYC BFF and I get together, we do "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." That is, we do what's thrifty in the city in NYC (mainly museums, thanks to BFF's numerous museum memberships), and what's thrifty here in Upstate in my city (thrift stores and Wegmans; yes, the NY metro area now has a Wegmans in the Brooklyn Navy Yard, but that's so far away from BFF on the Upper West Side that she says she'd rather just come here!).
@A. Marie, ha! As a Rochester native, I can attest to the social draw of Wegmans!
We like to play board games and card games with friends!
(Not trying to be disrespectful, but...) If you are an extrovert, maybe the solution is to find some new friends?
So many of the things potential friends did after work involved alcohol or coffee, and I don't care for either one. Though I would feel comfortable having another beverage, this sort of shut me out of their circles. I hope I didn't look like I was judging them--perhaps it appeared so-- but in any case, I never developed a good socializing gene. I mention this in case there is someone you might notice is being left out of group fun.
Many of the ideas here are great activities, from running errands to murder mystery parties. I will add one: Go Christmas caroling. Really. You need only a few good singers, and some others with enthusiasm, including children, or give them jingle bells to ring. We went in two cars to several homes where retired people from our school worked, sang one or two verses of a carol, asked if they had a request for a second one, and then maybe did a third. We ended at someone's house for hot chocolate and cookies. When we can breath covid-free air enough to sing, I would like to do this again.
@Heidi Louise,
A group of about four of my closest girlfriends and I did this in high school when we were juniors or seniors, totally impromptu one Friday night in December. We went to the homes of our school superintendent, principal, and a few of our teachers (small town life). The superintendent and his wife had us in for hot cocoa and cookies. It was so un-cool at that time period, but we didn't care - we had a blast. Caroling is a great suggestion.
My friends and I usually go to the beach together. I just swam with a good friend this morning, but when the ocean is nice we swim together almost everyday.
We also go biking, go to plant sales, gardens, birding and outdoor plant nurseries together.
When our kids were younger we would do more potluck dinners, BBQs, and meet at the park so the kids could play.
My BFF and I got certified to scuba dive together (many years ago) and used to go on weekend dive trips together. We had so much fun, I miss that. Sometimes we would rent a sailboat for a few hours and go sailing.
Expanding on #5 suggestion. Plan activities with family and friends that are free or close to free: free days at museums, free theater and concerts in the park, a beach day, a sporting activity (like basketball, beach volleyball, tennis at a public court), attend a lecture or poetry reading (if you live in a university town you could probably attend free lectures and talks every day of the week), community theater (nearly free), art shows and galleries, parades, hikes and walking tours, roller skating on the Boardwalk, informational "talks" (in my community we have docent walks thru the canyon and free herb/plant lectures), presentations by historical societies, picnics, bonfires, alumni gatherings (like homecoming), HS football games (nearly free), road trips to "world's biggest potato chip" or sight-seeing to free places like public gardens, public pools, or polo matches. Plant a tree! During Covid our community house started showing "drive in" movies (on the side of the building) which were free or on a donation basis. Perhaps this happens in other communities also? For Halloween, do a driving or walking tour of spooky houses in the neighborhood or if you live somewhere where this is possible, do a tour of scary places (cemeteries, Manson house, haunted hotels, Lizzie Borden's house) Online you can find all kinds of creepy places to visit or drive by-- For Christmas? Plan a caroling party where family and friends gather to sing from house to house (bringing instruments if you have them) or tour decorated houses or Santa's village or Xmas Tree Lane (if your town has one), ice skating on a public rink, sledding, have a building a snowman contest, visit an ice castle...
I like your volunteering idea. Sometimes we get so focused on fun, but we can bond and grow together while working alongside eachother. My husband and I got to know each other a lot while doing VBS and kid's club together.
For 30 yrs now my best friend & I walk each others' gardens. We both love plants, we both have lots of weeds & we both enjoy doing plant experiments so we take turns visiting each others' gardens to see how things are growing...or not! We getting together at my house this weekend to make kokedama (Japanese moss balls). Not a free activity because we did buy some supplies but as gardeners we had most of it on hand.
Other things I've done with friends: hike local trails, go on a picnic (we each bring our own sack lunch), visit free museums, get together to do crafts, trade books..we usually share a snack & tea or coffee when we talk books.
A few yrs ago I found a recipe I wanted to try (burnt cheesecake) so I sent a link to about a dozen friends, told them I was going to make it & asked them to come sample it with me. I suggested they find a recipe they wanted to try & bring it along. It was a huge hit & we really should do it again. We enjoyed a super fun sit-down meal together & all I had to do was make dessert.
I think the key is to think of something you want to do & invite someone to do it with you. Expect lots of nos & a few yeses but it's still worth the trouble.
In my small town we three museums but much more fun—and less costly, as in free!—is going to local art galleries. It’s exciting to see the work of newer artists and the galleries have opening receptions with free food and drinks (often music) for each new show. Super fun people attend these, too. More informal than museums which have a hushed atmosphere, galleries are pleasantly crowded with mingling and laughing and chatting to the artist(s).
Also popular here:
Several Salt Caves, rooms inside salt structures that are healthy to breathe in and a ton of fun. You can have snacks and drinks supplied and bring music. Like a beach scene without the ocean!
Several escape rooms where you and your family or friends have a certain amount of time to solve puzzles in the room in order to get back out.
Yoga classes in one museum, at a nature center, and at our lake (on the water! On standing paddle boards.).
A Tileworks where you can create pottery, then have it fired in a kiln. Wonderful gifts.
A towpath along our canal for biking or walking.
One of our parks has a Kids' Castle playpark, an adult circuit to exercise on structures, a frisbee golf circuit, BBQ pits—all free and ticking lots of boxes for grownups with or without kids. Also concerts weekly in summer evenings.
Museums have certain free days. Even the Bronx zoo is free on Wednesdays. Sometimes movie matinees are cheaper than evening shows. And in NYC where I live the libraries show movies and have music programs and book discussions. Of course this was all before COVID. My local library had free Chines Mah Jongg every Weds afternoon. It was so much fun. They tell me it will return soon. I hope so.
During the Big Shutdown, we started hosting dinners with another retired couple. Each couple provided part of the dinner. I've used some of your recipes which were very warmly received! Usually we BYOB. Sometimes we do a taste test, like sampling various dark chocolates, ice cream flavors, or rums. Although we can & do eat at restaurants now, we've continued enjoying our home cooked dinners together. Although we did not start with the intent of saving money, it's amazing much less it costs to eat at home. Party on the patio!
What great ideas! Several years ago when I lost a significant amount of weight, I realized how many social activities revolve around food. I've had to get creative to find healthier options. So much is dependent on where you live. I'm close to water and woods so outdoor activities are an option. Maybe try a new activity? I now love snowshoeing. I own my own, which was an initial investment, but after that it's essentially free. Kayaking, paddle boarding? For indoor activities, maybe one of those paint a picture group activities. I have seen some fun group games at Target recently in the $5 area. I bought one which is essentially a live version of the Clue game. Can't wait to try it. I do agree with the earlier commenter who said that sometimes you should do the less appealing activities. I don't love going out for drinks and dinner but I occasionally nurse along a glass of wine because I do like hanging out with friends and while everyone stops after one drink, it would put a damper on the evening if I didn't have that small indulgence.
Groupon is not nice to local businesses, and most don't actually get customers from it, so I respectfully suggest not doing that. But, there's always 'restaurant week' and they go on way longer than that. You can try some fancier places cheapER, not cheap-cheap.
@Meredith, No business is obligated to partner with Groupon. They know what is awaiting if they do, and I`m thinking if they take the time to do it it`s because they are hoping for people to actually buy the Groupons.
We really enjoy board game nights.
We also will do appetizer nights. Each family brings a couple appetizers to share and that’s our dinner! It’s always fun foods and appetizers are really easy to make!
I didn't read all the comments, so sorry if this has been mentioned. My friends and I organize a clothing swap. Once or twice a year, we all bring clothes we don't want anymore . Anyone can bring as many or as few as she has, and we also bring some snacks to share. We donate the extras to charity. It's a fun way to get "new" clothes.
Years ago, when I lived in a different city, I participated in "craft night". It was always the last Friday of the month. A friend's church let her borrow the basement for the night. We all gathered and did a craft that you were working on ( Lot of scrapbooking got done!) Everyone brought a snack to share and we had a fun night of conversation and working on own projects.
My mom has been a part of a Bunco ladies group for 20+ years. Members have filtered in and out but they trade off hosting so the cost is minimal. We spend time geocaching with friends, it can be free if you have enough phone data and don't spring for a premium membership. We usually bring lunch/snacks to save more money. We typically have friends over a few times a month, we cook dinner and they being side dishes and/or dessert. We play board games and they usually bring a new one to try. There are a lot of great free activities hosted at local libraries: murder mystery party, photo scavenger hunt, escape room, educational classes and book clubs.
If you want to expand your circle of friends, you could hold a Bring-A-Friend tea/lunch/brunch, etc. The idea is to invite a few of your closer friends to each bring someone from a different social circle that the others don't know. It's a good way to get to know people that you might not otherwise meet. (I've only done this once, and it was lots of fun! I suppose there could be potential downfalls if the people you each invite really don't get along, so know your audience before you try it.)
Kristen, those errand dates cracked me up. How sweet!
I agree with organising activities at home. I think the key is to make them simple, e.g. painting rather than making jewellery out of epoxy resin. That way it doesn't get too stressful. I would also say find a hobby together, for example learning to play badminton together. I'm not sure if you have Decathlon in the US, but they make a lot of fun games to play with friends in the park that are quite reasonably priced. Pick up a couple, and you can spend many fun hours in the park during the warmer months.
And lastly, try going out for lunch instead of dinner. Where I live, restaurants usually offer lunch sets that are way cheaper than dinner. When the inevitable "going out to eat" idea comes up, going for lunch instead of dinner can still save some money.
A long while back, my girlfriends and I did "She's Crafty" nights, where everyone brought something they were working on (needle work, art, knitting, mending - whatever). My something was an cross stich item I had had in a basket for three apartment moves...and I eventually finished it!
Each of us brought something snacky to share and we just talked and worked on something. One person just brought crafting supplies that needed to be sorted and organized. We had a blast, though maybe some would find it rather tame 🙂
Which reminds me, I should figure out how to get this on the calendar again....
I see many great ideas in the comments, that make me want to plan something right away!
The most frugal social activity I have, is outdoor swimming. I took this up last summer with some neighbours and we are still going (only for shorter swims) now that it is autumn. Never a better investment than my bathing suit! Note well: safety first! Do not go alone and familiarize yourself with the water (weather conditions, water quality, currents etc). Do not push yourself beyond the boundaries of what your body can take. Make sure you change into something dry and warm as soon as you get out of the water.
For me, this is the best start of the day possible. Feeling fit and alert and watching the best sunrises ever. For any who might want to start doing this, I would recommend starting in warmer months and slowly adjusting to the cold. Although having said that, some of our fellow swimmers started last winter, but they did so after taking an outdoor swimming course.
Hmm..... I don`t socialize much outside of work, now even less since Covid, but when I do it looks like this : meeting up for a walk, going out for brunch, having a movie night at home, hosting a game night, going to the movies. Other than that, what I do for free with (my husband) is : board games, walks, city badminton and pool (free), watching a show on Netflix. I also love thrift shopping and wish I had a girlfriend interested in this too, which would make for a cheap fun outing.
There are so many good ideas here! The only thing I would add is that it might help to make some frugal friends in addition to the ones you already have. My husband and I have found it really helpful that most of our friends have a similar standard of living and are trying to live as frugally as we are. When we spend time with family members who have a higher standard of living we find ourselves spending a lot more money than usual, while simultaneously feeling poor. But we don't feel poor at all when we are home and with our friends. Even if you still spend more money than you'd prefer with your existing friends, it could help to also spend time with like-minded people.
What about "garage sale-ing" (we have turned it into a verb at my house)? It's more about the adventure and it also often leads to some good conversations and the obligation to buy is nothing- but sometimes you'll find just the thing you didn't know you need.
I love playing cards/games but that only seems to happen with family as it's just a thing we do when we get together but I think you could start something with friends too!
Recently, my sisters and I met two women on different occasions who spoke about how our Mom had helped them meet people when they moved to town. She took/invited/dragged them to League of Women Voters meetings. This was the 1960-70s. We knew Mom was involved and even a local officer, but didn't know how she used that group for socializing as well as activism.
So as well as the volunteering that has been mentioned, perhaps becoming involved in a cause important to you will provide some new contacts.
My bestie of 27 years are both frugal. We would do sonic car dates ( for fountain drinks) during half price happy hour. Go grocery shopping T the same time. Go to rummage sales together. Scour locals for free events. We also would have frugal themed dinners. We tent camped in county camp sites. Went to beach days at little known free lakes. We raised kids at the same time and had lots of fun. Frugally rocks!
When I was trying to get out of debt I had to start turning down invites from friends for expensive nights out, so I started looking for free and cheap things to do, and inviting them to join me. $10 carload night at the drive-in movie, cheap happy hours, bands at small venues with no cover, bogo restaurant deals, etc. At one point I even found a country bar that was so desperate to get women in the door on ladies night that they would hand you $5 at the door just for showing up - with the cheap drink specials that $5 covered 2 drinks and a tip!
That was 25 years ago, and I'm out of debt, but I still approach my entertaining from a position of frugality. Poker night at home, concerts in the park, team trivia night at a local bar and grill that has half price appetizers and drinks on Thursdays, and we're good enough we usually win a $30 voucher we can use the next time.
I have discovered that most people are happy to be invited to something, and not be the one always trying to plan an outing.
It seems almost impossible to get together with friends since we all have kids that aren't quite teens yet and sitters aren't always available. When we can/do get together we don't care what we are doing as long as it's together!
Instead of strolling around our neighborhoods we have purposefully driven to a new spot (state, city park) and explored the area a little bit. Packing a lunch to go along makes it more fun and the car ride is extra time together. Sometimes the kids come, sometimes they don't. I found a book at the library that has walking tours of the area I live in (Minneapolis) so we've used that to do local urban exploring.
We've done movie and crafting night where we will watch a new movie or an old favorite from college while knitting away. Everyone brings a snack to share.
Another fun idea is meal prepping together. I found recipes online where you can prep meals to stash in your freezer. Someone with a Costco membership will do the shopping for everyone (which is reimbursed) and then we all meal prep together. Great bonding and it saves time down the road!
I don’t enjoy shopping, but I can go and browse. I can go to a bar or restaurant and have one drink or an appetizer and enjoy the company but not spend much money. There are, at certain times of the year, free concerts and free movies so that’s another way to do those activities your friends may enjoy and not spend. Here’s the thing about being frugal though, sometimes you have to decide what your top priority is. If spending time with friends is a top priority it might mean spending money you otherwise wouldn’t spend. As long as it doesn’t put you in a financial burden I don’t see the issue of doing it occasionally. And there are always rewards points or similar programs that can be redeemed for gift cards. If your friends want to go to the movies but you don’t want to spend actual money, you can earn gift cards to use for example.