Monday Q&A | Easter Bunny, Tithing, Blenders, and Bread
Every Monday, I answer a few of the questions that my readers send me. If you have a question you'd like me to answer in a future Q&A post, just leave me a comment here or email me (thefrugalgirl [at] gmail [dot] com) and put Q&A in the subject line. I look forward to hearing from you!
I have been following your blog since your appearance on "The 700 Club" (which was the first time I viewed the show). I love your views and your pictures. Anyway, my question is: I am a Christian who is a bit hesitant to share Easter with the Easter Bunny, the same way I am about sharing Christmas with Santa Claus. I have three children that are still very young, the oldest being 5 years old. I wanted to know your views on the topic and how you reconcile the world's version of Easter with the real meaning of the season.
Thank you in advance for your response.
-Paula
note: Because I'm feeling brave (or because I'm a little insane), I'm going to go ahead and tackle this controversial topic. I hope that you, dear readers, take my answer in the way that I intend it, which is as an explanation of what we do, and not a directive about how you should celebrate holidays.
While we do celebrate Christmas and Easter, we've never done the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus with our children. This is because we prefer to err very far on the side of caution when it comes to the truth of the things we share with our children. I know not everyone sees this issue the way we do, but we just are not comfortable doing things any other way. This has much less to do with keeping the holidays sacred (Easter and Christmas as holidays weren't exactly instituted by God himself, after all!), and more with us wanting to make sure our children never doubt the verity of what we say.
So, at Christmas, our kids know that the gifts they receive come from us and other family members, and at Easter, they know that we hide the eggs (we sequester them down in the office, where they wait very impatiently for us to do the hiding!). This hasn't seemed to dampen their enthusiasm for either of these holidays, and I think our celebrations are full of joy. We do eat Easter bunnies (usually in the form of Peeps!), and we have Santa wrapping paper, so we don't pretend these holiday icons are non-existent...our children just know they are not real.
Though our kids know why we do what we do, we are trying hard to instill in them a gracious and humble attitude towards families who operate differently than ours, and we teach them not to tell other children that Santa isn't real.
Regarding the last part of your question, we think that because Easter and Christmas are once a year events, it's far more important to focus on keeping our lives Christ-centered on a daily basis than it is to focus on ensuring that our holidays have a strong religious emphasis. So, while we do go to church on Good Friday, and we do go to our Christmas Eve service, we place a stronger value on going to church every other Sunday of the year. And while we don't necessarily read the Christmas story every December, we do read from the Bible each night during our family worship time.
I don't at all think it's wrong to come up with ways to incorporate faith into holiday celebrations...it's just not a large focus of mine, and so I don't have a lot of creative ideas! You might find Noel Piper's book about traditions to be helpful, though, as she's got a lot more to say on the subject than I do. 😉
I read your Q&A on smoothies. My question is what kind of blender do you use? I haven't had much luck with blenders being able to handle ice or frozen fruit.
-Charity
I have a fairly basic blender that Cook's Illustrated recommended. It does chop up frozen fruit just fine (I don't often use ice in my smoothies), but I can't really give it a hearty recommendation because the gear on the bottom of the jar is plastic and one prong of it has broken off.
I haven't decided what blender I'll buy when the rest of the gears on this one break, so I'm hoping that some of my readers will have a good recommendation for you and for me! I'd like to buy a blender that will last through years of smoothie-making.
I was wondering how you do tithes? Do you tithe on your allowance from husband or only on your earnings?
Brenda
Because my husband and I are both convicted about tithing, we do tithe on the gross of all of our income. My parents instilled this habit in me early on, so tithing is actually fairly easy for me. I'm sure that if someone looked at our budget over the years, they would have come to the conclusion that we could not afford to give away 10% of our income, but God has been faithful to provide for our needs, and we've never gone without, even in very lean times.
I also wanted to add that I don't have an allowance. Given that I'm better with money than my husband is (he'd say so himself), it would be sort of hilarious if he gave me an allowance! We share most everything here, so all the money that we we earn in this household is our money, regardless of who did the earning (we do each have "fun money", which is extra money we receive as gifts or earn on the side).
I have wondered, when you say you eat bread for lunch, does your family typically spread something on the bread, like peanut butter, or cheese or do you eat it just as bread?
-Zaheen
That depends on who's eating the bread! We all have different preferences...Zoe loves peanut butter on her bread, Lisey and Sonia are partial to cream cheese and jam, and Joshua loves butter and honey. They all rotate between different options, but no one here is much of a fan of eating sandwich bread plain.
I was wondering if there's a way to make the monkey bread and pull apart garlic bread with the same recipe. I noticed that they have different recipes for the basic dough, is there a way to make a neutral dough that can be used in both ways?
-Zaheen (she had several questions!)
You could use either dough for either bread, but it probably wouldn't be ideal. The dough for the monkey bread is sweeter and contains more fat (eggs and butter), which makes the dough softer. This would make your garlic bread a little bit sweet, which might be a little odd.
The sandwich bread dough, which is what I use to make my garlic bread, is not as sweet or soft, which means that your monkey bread wouldn't be quite as delicious as it would be with the sweet, eggy dough.
For what it is worth, I finally bought a commercial grade blender to do my smoothies. I kept wearing out motors on lesser blenders on the frozen fruit (I rarely use ice either). I just think it was most cost effective to not keep replacing the blender. And I love my new blender - two speeds and it is all I need. The only thing I wish were different is that the bottom came off. But I make our mayonaise in ours. I make my version of margerine or Laurel's Kitchen's Better Butter in it also. I also will whip up my version of Chai tea in it and it is a great version of the much more expensive version of Starbucks!
I really love this new feature - the Q&A. I have learned a lot from it. Thanks.
Excellent, Excellent, Excellent! My husband and I have the same views on the Christmas, and Easter situation. We work hard to make Christ a part of our lives everyday and teach our children the same. Our 6 children think of Santa and other holiday figures as cartoon characters. Being honest with our children is important in all things. We feel that in no way does this take away the excitement they have during holiday events. Sometimes it can be hard to explain why we do what we do. People tend to think that not emphasizing the sacred part of holidays means you don't believe in God when actually it is the complete opposite. We make him the center of our life everyday. I think you explained this perfectly and with grace. Thank you for this post. It just brightened my day.
Glad we're not the only ones out there! lol
Of course, all of this is not to say that people who have lots of faith-related holiday traditions are not also faith-filled the rest of the year. I'm just saying that I think the holiday stuff is optional for us, but that the day-to-day stuff is not, if that makes sense.
My parents did the same thing. They wanted us to be able to trust them no matter what they said. We still enjoyed the holidays just as much!
We *try* to handle Christmas/Easter similarly to you. We have always told my children that Mommy and Daddy pretend to be Santa/Easter Bunny as a fun game. Knowing this certainly hasn't dampened their enthusiasm! Our biggest problem is the my son (age 7) really, really wants to believe in Santa and the Easter Bunny just as his friends and cousins do. So, he goes between saying that it's a game to it's real. My daughter (age 3.5) doesn't care except she doesn't want either of them around her! Oh well.
That's how we are with the tooth fairy too. Our kids know there isn't a tooth fairy, but we refer to me as the tooth fairy when the occasion arises. =P Although, last time Sonia lost a tooth, Lisey delivered the money to Sonia's pillow. So, I guess we have multiple tooth fairies at our house. lol
My views are similar to you with regards to Christmas and Easter although growing up I believed in the Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny and Santa - that is how my parents raised us. My question is do your children realize that there are some other children that do believe those icons are real and do they know not to say anything to them?
Yup, as I mentioned in the post, we teach our children to not spill the beans when they're around children who do believe in Santa and the Easter Bunny. 🙂
LOL obviously I don't read that well, not sure how I missed that 🙂
I must admit, I'm a skimmer too, so I sometimes miss stuff like that in blog posts! lol
I guess I fall in the "odd" category with the Easter Bunny and Santa. But, to each his own, right? 😉
I have been meaning to ask ... you mentioned a while back that you're a Costco member. I was shocked! Please share how you spend frugally there. I usually SPLURGE there, and leave feeling guilty ... and always come back for more the next month. A guilty pleasure, I guess. 😉
Hee. I send my husband most of the time, and he is not at all an impulse buyer. I send him with a list, and he comes home with pretty much only what was on the list.
I used to buy more at Costco before I discovered Aldi, but now I only need a few things from there regularly. And my husband gets gas there on his way home from work.
Incidentally, I don't think you're odd if you do the Easter Bunny and Santa...I feel more odd for not doing it! lol Though, I suppose we all feel that way sometimes, depending on who we hang out with.
Two important things to know about making smoothies with ice: 1) the "bowl" of the blender needs to be glass - plastic will develop cracks over time (ask me how I know); 2) metal blades will definitely do a better job of chopping up the ice.
Yes, my jar is glass, and my blades are metal, but the stupid gears on the bottom of plastic. Dumb design, imo. They can't have thought it would last!
Yeah, I checked all the blenders when I registered for the metal gears on the bottom. I also wanted it to be glass. But, I didn't really care anything else about it. In engineering we are only taught how to design for the warranty period and nothing more. We aren't taught to design to last a lifetime, just to make it cheap and easy to make.
I make smoothies with ice every morning and have for about 3 years. I have a vitamix and I know it doesn't sound very frugal, but if I never have to buy a blender again (I know someone who has used theirs every day for 20 years) I think it's worth it to me and a very frugal option.
You know, I'm pondering forking over the cash for one of those when my current blender bites the dust. I'm a very big fan of paying more for something if it's going to last a lifetime...it's more frugal and more green.
I have to wholeheartedly support a vita mix blender purchase! Especially for a family like yours who has smoothies all the time.
I live in the southwest and margaritas (virgin or otherwise) 🙂 are mandatory. I also make crepes batter in mine, takes 2 seconds. The price is hard to get over, but it just annihilates anything in it and makes a very, very smooth smoothie. I use that blender probably at least 3 times a week, and I'm always grateful for the good tool that it is. Sometimes you do get what you pay for. They have them at Costco occasionally.
I bit the bullet last summer for one, I wish I was getting commission for every time I recommended it. I make so much in it.. from smoothies to hot soup.. I am glad I did and love the fact that I got a 7 year warranty with it. If you can, you should get it.
I have a dual Krups, a blender with a small food processor attachment. I do not use it daily. It has metal blender blades and a glass blender pitcher. It's lasted me 10-12 years without problem, and still going strong.
I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate your views on tithing. We do our tithing the exact same way. And I'm sure that if people looked at our budget they would make the same conclusion: that there are better ways to spend that money and that we can't afford to tithe. However, I feel the same as you, that the Lord is continually blessing us for the sacrifice and the giving that we do. Thanks for your encouragement in this matter. Your blog and your views are a blessing in my life.
I want to tell my children the truth about Santa and the Easter Bunny, but am torn with tradition in our family.
I also love these Q&A posts!
I have an Osterizer "Pulse-matic" "Cycle Blend" 10 button blender that was given to me at a wedding shower in (gulp) 1985 -- does this qualify as vintage? And do I, for that matter? 🙂 This puppy has held up, although i confess it doesn't get smoothie use every day. After an unfortunate accident, I replaced the original glass carafe with a plastic one just a few years ago and have not had trouble cracking ice, etc. The "works" seem never to fail -- suspect it's all metal down there -- no paltry plastic prongs! And each of the buttons is labeled, things like "liquify" and "puree" and other important terms for the smooshing of foodstuffs (i.e., blending of Slim Fast shakes). I give it many thumbs-up! And i kind of like its bland, 80's kitchen vibe -- all beige and brown, and reminiscent of shoulder pads and big hair. I wonder if picking up an old war horse at a thrift or garage sale would be useful, although maybe the vita mix is the way to go, since you truly smoosh, and daily.
I also had to replace my nice glass Oster jar with a plastic one after an unfortunate accident. I still love it, even with the plastic, and it works fantastic. I'd highly recommend an Oster blender.
Very nice job explaining your Christmas and Easter traditions. I am Jewish, but not religious and we "celebrate" both Easter and Christmas in my home, just like my parents did. I wasn't until maybe high school that I even learned that Easter was a religious holiday. For me, Christmas is about family and choosing gifts that honor the recipient, and Easter is about a fun morning with candy and an Easter egg hunt.
It's good to see so many points of view.
There are so many different ways to recognize holidays, and I appreciate your even handed explanation of what your family does.
Thanks!
Katy
We tell our kids that Santa is "a fun story", but we choose not to decorate with Santas. Just our preference.
I bought my husband a hand-held immersion blender a couple of years ago for Father's Day (he makes fabulous Swedish pancakes frequently and it's great for the batter). It works very well for smoothies, Laurel's Kitchen Better Butter, and also for pureeing soups. I've also used it for making bread crumbs. I bought the Kitchen Aid brand, which has a strong motor. It doesn't take much space to store, and I really can't think of any "blender job" that it can't handle. It came with a small mixing jar, but I bought a straight-sided 2-quart plastic pitcher at Goodwill that works much better.
By the way, "Better Butter" is like home-made margarine: 1 lb. butter, 1 cup canola oil, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt. Blend it up and store it in the fridge. It tastes just like butter, but with fewer calories and less saturated fat. And it's cheaper than straight butter! Don't use it for baking though, the water will make your stuff not turn out.
Thanks for the Better Butter recipe! I want to try that! I'm assuming you use unsalted butter? Do you soften it before blending?
A compliment for you, Kristen: Although my life is quite different from yours (I'm single with no kids) and I do not share all of your beliefs ... I love the style in which you share your views, convictions, and family traditions. To be able to not de-emphasize/downplay yourself while at the same time not downgrading others is a real skill. (haha - is "de-emphasize" even a word? I'm sure you will understand what I'm trying to say)
Aww, thanks! I'm so glad that my explanation came out the way I wanted it to...I was a little bit nervous about a topic like this, because I've been witness to some knock-down, drag-out, uh, discussions about it on the internet! lol
I think de-emphasize is a word. =P
Kristen, I have enjoyed your blog. Good ideas on being frugal, warm and sensitive when sharing your faith. I grew up in a family that did all the traditional Santa, Easter Bunny stuff in addition to the religious aspects of the holidays. When my husband and I needed to make decisions about these with our own boys, we decided that the "world" would fill in our kids regarding Santa and company. But if we didn't teach them Jesus, who would? I don't think we were ever dogmatic about it, we just emphasized Christ. Like you and your husband we made Jesus part of all of our lives. Best wishes as you and your family continue to live for Him.
Further to what I have just written, I'm curious about something. You mentioned being homeschooled as a child. How did that fit in to your ability to follow your own convictions? Were you less susceptible to peer pressure? I'll assume your siblings were homeschooled as well so I was wondering if they stick to their convictions as well as you seem to be able to do?
I think it depends on the child and their personalities. Being home schooled definitely helps be less susceptible to peer pressure, but once you get out to the sports, art, college, and work world you still get some pressures. For the most part we had the ability to choose whatever we wanted, as long as it was morally right and didn't break any of God's laws.
Hmm, that's an interesting question. I do think that homeschooling allows children to develop convictions and such more easily apart from peer pressure (not that homeschoolers never have peer pressure...it's just usually a little less constant). I also think that homeschoolers tend to be more influenced by their parents and less by their peers.
I was a really unusual teenager, and if I'd gone to regular school, I probably would have been the subject of some teasing. So, I'm glad I was able to be home and learn without being distracted by all of that.
As far as sticking to my convictions...I don't know if that's attributable to homeschooling or not. I suppose it could be because I had a free environment to let my convictions get rooted and established.
That's a very rambly answer, and I'm sorry! lol I'll have to ponder this some more.
I wasn't home-schooled, but I have known several home-schooled friends. My parents played a pretty big role in our lives, even though they both worked, because they made a conscious decision to be present, and not absent, even through the sometimes-tough teenage years.
I think homeschoolers have the advantage of constant contact with their parents - you certainly can't avoid your mom or dad when she or he is your teacher! At the same time, homeschooling parents still have to make that effort of communication.
I sometimes used to wish I and my siblings had been homeschooled to avoid some of the busywork so common in mainstream public schools, but I don't think I ever really thought about the teasing. I do remember thinking how stupid it was for one classmate to get worked up over something trivial (who likes who, or who got invited to what birthday party) to the detriment of schoolwork - we were there to learn!
I use a MagicBullet Blender for my smoothies, but I don't know how well that would work with smoothies for five! 🙂
I grew up without make-believe holiday characters and loved my childhood experiences. This is a bit of an issue between my boyfriend and I. He grew up with mythical creatures of all kinds, and he loved it. His stance is that it makes everything more magical and that it keeps the kids from growing up too fast. He has a point, as my sister and I never played princess and dragons, but instead spent our time "running from the Yankees" (via Gone With The Wind) and preparing "dinner" with miscellaneous weeds from around the lawn.
I'm afraid Santa and the Easter Bunny may have to be (a minor) part of our home together, but I am encouraged by your advice. I agree that it is most important to go to church every Sunday, and to be a Christian every day.
We grew up without Santa and the Easter Bunny, and my sister and I still used to make up very fanciful stories because we both read so much - think The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, but with more intelligent monsters 😉
I don't think you have to believe in Santa and the Easter Bunny in order for your kids to have a very full imginative life. Just expose them to lots of fantasy books. It worked for us, so well that my sister and I both won minor awards at our very large high school for fantasy stories. 😀
I love this Q&A! It was amazing and inspiring to read about when people tithe! Especially when other people would believe you crazy to do so, still faithful to God as He has been to us.
And I love how you showed how you keep your home Christ centered. I grew up with my parents telling us about Santa and my husband and I have concluded that we don't want to do that with our future kids. I like what you've outlined, I'm taking notes from you indeed!
As someone who has 2 small children (and hopes to have more), we haven't decided on what we're going to do about Santa/Easter Bunny yet...but I feel more and more like you do as the time to choose gets closer. How you handle those holidays sounds just right and I love that you have a family worship time!
Kristen, you continue to amaze and humble me every time you take on a controversial topic like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. I think you have a gift for giving your opinion and how your family does things without offending anyone. I enjoy reading your posts on these topics, no matter my own views on them. Thank you for being so honest!
I grew up waiting for Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, but I don't think it diminished the religious factor at all for me. I am Catholic, which means a lot of things are different for me, but we also celebrated holidays as both religious and secular celebrations. The Christmas season was (and still is) a variety of different events from decorating to wrapping gifts to lighting the Advent candles and praying every night. The nativity was also especially important; we set it out when we put up our Christmas decorations, but the baby Jesus didn't appear until Christmas Eve. Some years I would move the Wise Men closer and closer to the nativity starting Christmas Day and ending on the Epiphany. My mom always walked a careful line between making sure I understood the meaning of the season and the secular aspects of the holiday. Santa Claus did come visit and La Befana (the Italian "good witch" who visits children on the eve of the Epiphany) even put in an appearance there for a while. It's a difficult line to walk, I think, and there is no right way to go about it. I've seen plenty of children who believe in Santa Claus and still maintain close relationships with Christ. I've also seen plenty of children who don't believe in Santa (either for religious or intellectual reasons) who become preachy to their peers about the subject and/or have lost a good amount of the innocence that comes from being a child a Christmas.
I'm not saying that the way my parents did it was right, nor do I believe that there is one correct way to celebrate religious holidays. One of the most special things about the holidays is family traditions, and whatever any one does is special just for that reason.
Okay this was super long! Sorry! 🙂
I heartily agree with Elizabeth L. - you are truly thoughtful about how you live your life and beliefs AND how you communicate about them. As a non-Christian, it interests me to know how you (and other readers) differentiate between the religious and secular aspects of holidays - and it makes perfect sense. I struggle with the (all-consuming) consumer character of most major holidays, as I know we all do, so I enjoy hearing how people keep that in perspective.
Aww, thanks! I'm so glad you found it interesting and not offensive. 🙂
I agree that you have a gift for writing about delicate topics in an even-handed, non-judgmental manner, Kristen. Well done.
I have such happy memories of Christmas from my childhood. We "did" Santa, but my dad always said "I believe in the spirit of Santa Claus" when I queried him about it. They never lied, per se. One day I just figured it out. My husband's family didn't "do" Santa because his parents were immigrants and Santa wasn't a part of their native culture. We are "doing" Santa with our kids and we have a lot of fun with it.
The Easter Bunny, on the other hand... I'm just not that into him, lol, or any of the secular aspects of Easter. I'm candied out after Halloween/Christmas/Valentine's Day. My younger son is allergic to peanuts so we try to minimize candy in the first place. This year we went to church on Easter and came home and relaxed as a family. No baskets, no eggs, no candy. I felt like such a scrooge--but they didn't seem to care! (Helped that the next day was older son's birthday and lots of cake and presents came with that.)
I too am Catholic. We celebrate Christmas and Easter as very religious holidays. The Easter Bunny is a fun character who comes to visit in the early morning right before church. We truly believe in Santa simply because St. Nicholas was and is a real living person/saint. And since we Catholics continue to pray to all the living and dead saints, it's okay to believe that St. Nicholas is a giver of gifts just as the Wise Men brought gifts to baby Jesus. That's just how we do it and probably lots of other Catholics do too. I respect your beliefs and living in the Bible belt I'm kind of in the minority here. I find most of my neighbors don't celebrate Halloween for their own religious reasons(Witches are Satanic images, etc.) But again, being Catholic it's okay to celebrate since it's the day to scare away the "bad guys" since the Next day is again a Catholic holiday--All Saints day. I'm just curious how you handle Halloween.
I'm Jewish, so we've sworn our son to keeping the truth about Santa and the Easter Bunny to himself 😉 I thought the tooth fairy, though, could be a fun thing for him to "believe in"--but, he didn't like the idea of anyone coming into his room while he was asleep...most of all not some fairy that he had never seen. So, alas, he's always known the tooth fairy is mom and dad.
I'm also Jewish -- and my brothers and I never believed in the tooth fairy though our parents made every attempt to encourage that belief. I think that Jewish kids who grow up knowing the truth about Santa and the Easter Bunny (even in the face of all the social and commercial pressure in this culture) are not likely to believe in the tooth fairy either. Just my two cents based on my own family.
I never even tried to convince my kids about the tooth fairy. Like Kristen's family, my kids have always known that the tooth fairy is, in fact, mom.
Okay, 3rd Jewish mom here: we also swore our son to secrecy and begged him not to tell his friends the truth about Santa and the Easter Bunny. To my knowledge, at almost 9, he has never ruined this for any of his friends. We also didn't lie to him about the Tooth Fairy because we wanted him to know he could trust what we said was the truth. Well, this just came home to roost the other day in a most interesting way: he went to the dentist and ended up having a baby tooth extracted unexpectedly. The dentist denied removing the tooth and said he'd "moved the tooth with water", that the nitrous oxide was "magic scented water", and that there was no blood in his mouth when he could clearly tell that there was. My son was furious! He felt so betrayed and said over and over "he lied to me!" I tried to explain that perhaps the dentist was used to talking with kids whose parents sugarcoat things and try and hide the truth but I really couldn't say anything that made sense to him. It didn't make sense to me either, that a dentist would think a kid of his age would believe that baloney! All I know is, my son and I are still so angry that we have to get a new dentist... You can't underestimate how important it is for kids to have faith that their parents are truthful with them, even when the subject is unpleasant or difficult.
Also one more thought. I thought the Easter Bunny and Santa were just fun ways to engage children in the holidays...yes? No? We have similar "engage the kids" traditions like stealing the Afikomen (a 1/2 sheet of ceremonial matzah) at Passover. But I guess that doesn't include parent to child deception...it just promotes stealing among children in return for blackmailing the parents for a reward ;-).
(Sorry, I didn't notice this comment before I answered the other one...)
Don't forget about Elijah visiting the Passover Seder as well. Do you shake Elijah's cup (or the table under it) so that a bit will spill out and it will look as though Elijah has taken his sip? That's a long-standing tradition in our household. The kids aren't fooled, but they love it anyway.
We did the same thing when our sons were growing up with Christmas, Easter and with losing teeth or any other typical make believe character for kids. I remember the day I discovered Santa was not real and I wondered what else my parents were just making up.
Thanks for sharing your view point!!
When Thomas was four, he asked me if Santa was real, and I launched into this long talk about myth and how we can pretend about something without it being real, and he listened, then, when I was done, declared, "Santa is real!" Okay, then.
Then, this last Easter, he told me, "I think the Easter Bunny is a myth." I was very excited, thinking he'd finally gotten it. So I asked him what a myth was, and he knew, but then I asked him why the Easter Bunny was a myth, and he told me there is no such thing as a giant bunny, so the Easter Bunny must actually be a small bunny. I realized he hadn't really gotten it.
I must have been the world's most gullible child, because my mother would buy our Christmas presents with us there. She said that Santa was extremely busy, and so she was helping him out, and would ship the presents to the North Pole so he could deliver them. The absurdity of this explanation (and inefficiency of that set-up!) didn't occur to me until I was maybe 9.
Thanks for answering some of my many 😉 questions Kristen!
Kudos for great treatment of the topic, Kristen.
On blenders, have you heard of the Blendtec Total Blender? Search YouTube...their commercials are hilarious, and it does look like it can handle anything.
Do you teach your children how to earn the praise that comes from greedy pastors. Devout tither that you are, this is all the praise you get.
I don't tithe for praise...I tithe because I love God, and I teach my children to do the same.
Also, my pastor isn't greedy...he repeatedly refuses raises. 🙂 It sounds like you've maybe had some bad experiences with pastors, but not all are money-hungry.
Someone mentioned how humbling it is see how graciously you always handle these sticky questions, and it is so true! I was so busy blabbing early this morning about my ancient osterizer I plum forgot to thank you, once again, for setting such a lovely, evenhanded example of how to be in the world. I think that's why I always check FG first -- for lessons in How To Be A Grownup. Thank you!
You need a Blendtec... I've used one and it's awesome! This blender is better than the VitaMix, I've seen a comparison sheet.
http://www.blendtec.com/
Another wonderful post.
We have a 16 month old, so we're not having to deal yet with Easter Bunny or Santa Claus, however, we've discussed it. Mr. V doesn't want to bring Santa into it at all. He says he's not going to lie to his son because then his word is no good. (Which I understand, because if you're going to lie about that, then what else are you going to lie about!) And, though as kids we'd always gotten Easter baskets and hid Easter eggs, we always knew it was the adults doing it. But as far as Christmas is concerned...I'm trying to think of a way of keeping my son from being made fun of by his friends. I am afraid that they'll tell him that the only reason "Santa" doesn't see him is because he's a bad kid. I'm trying to avoid that. Because no matter how many times he tells them that Santa isn't real, you can't sway the convictions of a 5 year old. How do your children handle such comments from their peers?
Aww. I'm kind of bummed out a bit reading these comments. I think Santa and the Easter Bunny are such important parts of childhood. You never again in your life have the ability to un-questioningly believe in something so fun and joyous. Once you find out they aren't real, there is no going back.
I have to disagree that telling kids about Santa and the Easter Bunny makes them think you are liars. I was bummed out at first when I found out they weren't real, but I never blamed my parents for lying to me. I appreciated that they were so intent on keeping the magic of childhood alive for as long as possible. You only get to be a kid for so long - you can be a grown-up the rest of your life!
I certainly respect everyone's opinions on the subject, but I was kind of hoping there would be a few people posting for the other side!
i had plenty of fun on holidays (as do my children). they aren't "grown up" just because they don't believe in santa & the easter bunny. my kids enjoy us decorating eggs & having candy & giving gifts. no magic needed. i think my children are what creates the " magic" as you call it. we have such super holidays. plus i want my children to know that we are the ones who care for them enough to buy them gifts & not some stranger in a red suit. that's fine if others do but people have the right to do whatever in their own family.
Erika:
We love Santa and the E.B. in our house and I have thoroughly enjoyed watching my kids be delighted by these things. And I totally appreciate Kristen's thoughtful views on how her family has gone in the other direction. I think one of the things that defines a real community is a willingness amongst the members to value differing beliefs and opinions without anyone having to be "right." Kudos to you Kristen--you've helped create a community where we can talk about topics like this respectfully and openly. How awesome is that?!
Trust me, I agree completely that she does a great job creating a warm, open area where people can discuss different views of topics. Like I said, I respect other's opinions and respect that people can live their lives however they choose. I was just merely stating MY opinion on the topic.
You're doing a great job explaining your beliefs in Easter and how you celebrate. Do not worry about stepping on toes with this-I spent many years teaching elementary school Art in a school with a large Muslim population. The parents of the Muslim students had clearly told their children to be polite to the students of other faiths-no pooching on Santa or the Easter Bunny.
I think it's a common problem for parents in a country of many faiths. (And a variety of practices with one faith, too!!)
My dad is a pastor and has been for over 40 years, and I have not ever once in my lifetime felt that he lied to me. Especially about the Easter Bunny & Santa Claus. Take heart 🙂
That was meant for Erika 🙂
Hi Kirsten,
From one kindred spirit to another: My children are now in their teenage years or are grown up. I am pleased to tell you that as they hit their teenage years it was quite wonderful and very helpful to be able to say them "I've never lied to you.... not even about Santa Claus or the Easter bunny." because at that period of their life, they are questioning everything - even your morality.
Congrats on doing the same. The small disappointment they may feel at knowing these characters are not real is far outweighed by the fact that they have a straight-north compass in the mother ( and father). In this world it's important to have an accurate compass to point the way.
great job Kristen, we agree in the holiday aspect as well as the tithing. we do the same. 🙂 i enjoy ging to your site daily. thanks again!
*going....lol
Dear Frugal Girl, I had seen you on the 700 Club and that is the first time I had ever heard of you. Just wanted to say thank you for your beautiful homemade feeling that you give to the public! I very much appreciated your answers on the Easter bunny & Santa, also your answers on tithing. I am a Born Again Christian and raised my children the same actually telling them their gifts were from Jesus...because without Him we wouldn't have the resources to purchase them. Love what your doing!!! Thank You for taking the time,
Sherry
Dear Kristen,
I think you also did a great job with the allowance question. That question bothered me a little bit - but again you showed me its best to explain kindly rather than be on the offensive.
Vickie
Yeah, I was kind of shocked to read the "allowance" and was thinking that Kristen must have talked about that somewhere and I missed it. It's funny with us because even though hubby is the "breadwinner," if anything HE is the one with the allowance because it's my responsibility to make sure our bills get paid and our money lasts...
my family (thanks to my mother) stopped celebrating easter, halloween & christmas the "american" way about 9 years ago. and WE LOVE IT. there are no easter egg hunts. santa claus is put away after st. nicholas day. christmas eve we sing happy birthday to jesus & eat cake instead of leaving out cookies. mary & joseph (2 little figurines) make their way from one side of the house to the other & end up in a cardboard-box manger on christmas morning. and halloween is celebrated with a new movie & flashlights (we leave all the lights off so we don't get any trick-or-treaters).
so my question is how do YOU celebrate halloween? my mom's original intention behind taking the "commercialism" out of holidays was NOT to deprive us or shelter us or never lie to us about the easter bunny/santa...but her convictions are still in the fact that we've steered far away from the TRUE meaning of the seasons. married but without children yet, my husband & i are just now decided how we want to create our own traditions now & incorporate children when they come along...i'd love your perspective....
i got a magicbullet EXPRESS for xmas and it's amazing!!!! i never wanted the magicbullet because it was way too small! the express has an amazing motor! it has so many features it's worth every cent! i can't say enough good things about it! i own a kitchen aid blender (from the previous xmas, so it's still brand new) and it's never been nearly as powerful as the express. i do not know how long they last though, as i did not research them, i got it as a gift.
I know this may seem crazy to a lot of people, but in our family we don't celebrate Easter or Christmas in the "traditional" sense. Jesus is celebrated in our lives daily. For Christmas, we don't decorate and we don't give each other gifts. Our children enjoy giving to organizations such a Operation Christmas Child since they realize that they are blessed to be a blessing. For Easter, there is no Easter bunny or eggs either. We don't see any correlation with bunnies and eggs and candy with the life, death, and resurrection of Christ.
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2
Hi
I just want to know about tithing....my spouse is unemployed and my salary can only cover the bills.So,if we tithe, we will go into debt or during the month having to ask family to subsidise us till month-end.We dont live lavishly at all,have paid all our debts(except for the bond & car),keep a proper budget & stick to it.We have not even bought clothes for ourselves nor for our son,bcoz we dont have the cash.Do we still tithe under these circumstances?Deut 28 says that we will loan nations,but we will not borrow and the bible also tells us that God hates debt.And it also tells us that we must always act in a way to bring glory to God, so that people will come to God thru our actions.Please assist.
I hope I'm not overstepping here. What we always say about tithing is that we can't afford NOT to. God even says in Malachi to test him and see if he doesn't bless you. We have a VERY tight budget. But, our tithe is at the top of the list. 10% plus a little extra offering as well. Not because we can afford to give lavishly, but because we feel it's an important part of honoring God with our finances. And, I am continually amazed at how things happen to make ends meet. We take steps. We make sacrifices sometimes. All of my kiddos things pretty much are second hand--clothes, toys, etc. All of our things that can be are second-hand and I never get new clothes. But, that's okay with us. Tithing is a non-negotiable part of our budget, just like our bills. And, God has never let us down. Once, when things were particularly tight, we got a refund check from our car insurance company saying members had paid more than they had used up in claims so everyone got to split the extra! Seriously...how often does THAT happen?!
We used to tithe on hubby's "bring home" pay, until the beginning of last year when we felt convicted to start tithing on his actual salary--before taxes, etc.--instead, and to add a little extra. Our tithing amount jumped from $100 twice a month to $175 twice a month. We never even missed it, and that's the truth. I'm not saying you won't miss it at all, but I truly believe (and God says) that if you give your money over to Him and trust Him enough to provide for you, He will not let you down.
Good luck to you in deciding what to do.
We do like you, Crystal, and tithe on the gross pay, not take-home. And God has been faithful to supply our needs. Kay, I was going to offer up the same verse Crystal did...God's promised to supply your needs if you tithe, so go ahead and do it. 🙂
Great post. We don't do Easter Bunny or Santa Claus, but we also choose to celebrate those for their faith-based meaning, since they are so important to our faith rather than the more commercial side. I still don't feel it will deprive my children. And, it's not to say that we don't incorporate our faith into our every day lives. (we also celebrate birthdays even though we love on our children every day...for me it's the same kind of concept. We live our lives full of our faith, but we still want to impress them with the spiritual meanings behind those special days as well). We get tons of grief from family members over not doing santa and the easter bunny, but oh well.
We tithe the same way, and I'm sure people would feel the same way because we've had some lean times. I'm always amazed at the "can't afford to tithe" argument though and I say that we can't afford NOT to. God challenges in Malachi to "test him" and see if he doesn't bless you for giving to him and we've been witness to that time and time again. If you don't see how your money will last, you can either hang on to it and try to make it work, or give it to God and watch as He provides and makes it last...that has been my experience anyway. (obviously responsible management and stewardship is a good thing too!)
My views on Santa and the Easter Bunny and wanting to be truthful to my children are the same as yours. And my kids love celebrating just the same. My opinion is that kids who know there is no Santa are less likely to tell other kids than kids who have believed it all their lives and just found out the truth. I think those kids may feel like they need to break it to other kids who are still in the dark...
Last year my son who was 3 at the time was asked by an adult something about Santa. Elijah replied "Santa is dead". Thankfully no children were around at the time as I explained that we had taught the children about Saint Nicholas who had lived a long time ago. When my kids asked me if Saint Nicholas had died I told them the truth that he had. This year Elijah has found some tact and now tells people "Santa is really Saint Nicholas" and leaves out the other details. lol....