Meet a Reader | JenRR from the Midwest
1. Tell us a little about yourself
My current lifestyle would probably qualify as frugal-lite compared to many others. I was a bit intimidated by this, but then I figured I probably wasn’t the only person out there who isn’t ultra-frugal at the moment.
I have had times when it was necessary to stretch every cent, but thankfully we have more wiggle room these days.
I’m 47, married, and living amongst the cornfields in a college town in the Midwest U.S.
I’ve been an architect, day-care teacher to toddlers, and library clerk, but am currently a SAHM to a 14yo son and 9yo daughter. We share our home with a 70lb rescued mutt.
Before kids, I spent my free-time volunteering at a stray rescue shelter for dogs. After I had kids, I swapped that time to growing all sorts of interesting heirloom foods in my backyard. I’ve always loved historic architecture, exploring by foot, animals, swimming, reading, and just generally creating things.
My family loves watching movies and tv series together, and having regular game nights.
In January, the four of us put together a long list of games we wanted to play, many of which were just gathering dust in the basement, and it has become a joint New Year’s resolution to get through all of them before the year is over!
When the weather is nice, we love to find outdoor spaces to explore.
2. How long have you been reading The Frugal Girl?
I started reading The Frugal Girl back in 2010 when Kristen’s kids were still itty bitty.
My oldest was barely a year old and I had just been laid off from my job as an architect. I was searching for ways to cut back on expenses and found this blog. I quickly became a daily reader.
3. How did you get interested in saving money?
At age 12, I started saving up my allowance and babysitting money to buy Christmas gifts for other children who were less fortunate.
The more kids I could “adopt”, the better! As an adult, it’s important to me to continue to be generous, as well as, provide financial security for myself and my family.
4. What's the "why" behind your money-saving efforts?
After I became a mother, finances became much more complicated. Besides dealing with my sudden unemployment when my oldest child was a toddler, I was hoping to figure out a way to extend my time at home with him.
The year after I lost my job, my husband got laid off. It was a rough few years, but I did everything I could think of to spend as little as possible and we got through it. It became very important to us to create a financial cushion and get beyond living paycheck to paycheck.
As our family and household income grew, my husband and I made it a goal to put more money aside for emergencies, retirement, college, home improvements, etc.
It’s important for my mental health to know we are doing what we can to protect our future selves.
5. What's your best frugal win?
After going through some years of job instability, my husband got a great new job in another state. We rented at first, but the rental situation in our new town was poor. I was determined to buy a house that was less than we could afford.
While we were still renting an apartment, I researched areas with lower property taxes, scouted out my ideal neighborhoods, and waited for a smaller, less expensive house to come on the market.
We ending up buying our current home in 2015, when local prices and interest rates were significantly lower. Nine years later, the rent for similar homes in our neighborhood is double the cost of our mortgage!
Despite an increase in income, we’ve continued to stay in our small home so the extra money can go into our savings/retirement funds. Having money already set aside also means we can pay upfront for most home maintenance costs.
Another big win would be taking advantage of our great public library system. After nine years, we’ve checked out materials valued at over 100k! This doesn’t include the many free in-library activities we’ve enjoyed over the years.
6. What's an embarrassing money mistake you've made?
My early twenties were pretty much one huge embarrassing money mistake!
I grew up with the misconception that a college degree pretty much guaranteed a comfortable income, and that I wouldn’t have to worry too much about money when I got a “real” job. The first few years after graduating, I racked up a large credit card debt and bought a new SUV that cost approximately the same as my annual salary.
At the time, I thought my income would quickly increase and everything would be easy to pay off, but I spent the second half of my twenties paying off that debt. I did drive that vehicle for 14 years, so it wasn’t a total loss.
7. What's one thing you splurge on?
My garden.
I invested a decent amount of money getting things started because it was something I really needed and wanted for myself. I designed everything, built the cedar beds from scratch, put up wire fencing, built vertical growing structures, and hauled in the soil.
Over the years, I’ve invested small amounts at a time, extending my growing space, adding several types of berries, planting cherry trees, and growing an asparagus patch from seed.
I save money where I can, reusing old food containers for my multitude of seasonal seedlings, getting free five-gallon buckets from the bakery to use for extra growing space, making compost from our fruit and vegetable scraps, and starting almost everything from seed.
I carefully save my seed packets to use over several years and even harvest some seeds from my previous year’s plants so I don’t need to buy as many in the future.
Besides providing large quantities of food for my family and a creative outlet for myself, all of this allows me a means of being generous to my community through extra food, plants and growing supplies.
I am lucky enough to live in an area with groups that will redistribute home gardener’s extra produce to soup kitchens and food insecure families.
8. What's one thing you aren't remotely tempted to splurge on?
I think my answer to this is covered in #10.
9. If $1000 was dropped into your lap today, what would you do with it?
I’d probably put it in our house improvement fund. We’ve been wanting to add finished space with a bathroom to our basement. Any extra money towards that project would be awesome.
10. What's the easiest/hardest part of being frugal?
The easiest part of being frugal for me is being completely uninterested in trends.
I wait to find things that I love and then pretty much use them until they die. Our first house post-wedding was very sparsely furnished/decorated because I didn’t want to spend money on something I didn’t absolutely love.
The same goes for things like clothes. If they‘d still fit, I’d be content to continue to wear my clothes from the early 2000s. It’s probably a good thing they don’t!
The hardest part of being frugal for my family is food!
My son is allergic to dairy, wheat, nuts, eggs and peas. I’m allergic to shellfish and can’t digest certain foods like apples. My husband can’t have nuts, eggs, lactose, and several types of fruit.
Some foods, like my son’s allergy-safe bread, are so much more expensive than the more typical versions of the same food. It’s now up to $11 per loaf! Add to that that my kids are now 9 and 14 and have much bigger appetites. We spend a painful amount of money on groceries these days.
11. Is there anything unique about frugal living in your area?
I live in a fairly transient town with lots of college students. People are always moving and getting rid of stuff.
Every May, when school gets out, the lawns around campus are filled with items students didn’t want to bother bringing home. It’s unbelievable what they leave behind!
I tend to stick closer to my neighborhood, but if you were starting fresh and needed to outfit a new apartment, you could probably get nearly everything you needed with the right timing.
12. What frugal tips have you tried and abandoned?
I have given up on second hand kids’ clothing. When we lived in a bigger city, we had great resale stores for used clothing and toys.
Unfortunately, that was not the case after we moved. It was not worth it to me to dig through unorganized racks of clothing attempting to find something passable in a size we could use. The prices were not low enough to justify the time and patience required.
I really miss our old secondhand stores with good condition items sorted into specific sizes! I ended up switching to shopping sales, using discounts/bonuses, and planning ahead.
In order to best make use of sale opportunities, I started using a clothing inventory chart I saw in The Tightwad Gazette to keep track of what I had/needed in various sizes. It was helpful in making sure I had everything we needed without overbuying.
After all, accidentally buying too many shirts on sale isn’t exactly saving us money!
13. What's your funniest frugal story?
I decided to try a recommendation for saving deodorant that I read about in The Tightwad Gazette. I saved up a drawerful of ends of deodorant sticks (the part you can’t use without it repeatedly falling out onto the floor), melted them down in the microwave, and poured everything into an already empty deodorant container.
It worked, but only created about ⅓ of a new stick! Definitely not worth the drawer space.
14. How has reading the Frugal Girl changed you?
I’ve been inspired to mend things!
I’ve now fixed so many hems and unstitched seams! On multiple occasions, I’ve received new items ordered online only to find seams already coming apart. When a company doesn’t want the item back, they simply refund the money and I am able to make the necessary repairs myself, saving money and landfill space.
More recently, I managed to repair my cloth grocery bags (all acquired for free) with things I already had around the house. I reinforced seams, closed up holes, and repaired seriously damaged handles that were almost worn through.
They will continue to be in use for many more years to come.
15. Which is your favorite type of post at the Frugal Girl and why?
I love many of the posts, but my favorite regular topics are Five Frugal Things and Thankful Thursdays. They help me to be more mindful of all the little things.
I also greatly appreciate Kristen’s honesty about all the real things of life. It’s much easier to relate to people who let you see beyond a perfect public persona.
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Jen, I loved all the pictures you sent! You do a great job of composing your pictures, and I especially loved the ones of the kittens. So cute!!
I noticed your daughter's hair was curly when she was younger and now it looks straight; Zoe used to have curls as a toddler, and now her hair is mostly straight too. That picture of your girl with the okra is just TOO cute. I kept looking back at it as I put the post together!
I love that you are repairing your reusable bags. You have to use those bags so many times in order for them to be an environmental win, so whenever we can repair them, that's awesome.
About allergies: I am in awe that you manage to work around so many conflicting allergies! I had a hard enough time with Zoe's shellfish allergy plus Sonia's dairy/raw produce/nut/seed allergies. I think you should just pat yourself on the back for getting any meals on the table, regardless of how much they cost. 🙂
Waving hi from another college town amidst the corn fields!
With that much gardening, I don't think you're frugal lite! I think you're frugal smart - putting your energies towards big things and knowing where to spend.
I also found, that as my kids grow, thrift stores are not as helpful. The ones around me aren't organized very well, and don't seem to have the inventory like some people write about here.
@mbmom11, Hi! I love frugal smart. That’s a great term.
Jen,
Thank you for sharing your interview. I spent the first 30+ years of my life living in college towns in the Midwest. I loved reading about the contented life you built for yourself and your family. I appreciate your reference to The Tightwad Gazette and I agree that the deodorant hack is not worthwhile.
Food allergies are tough and you have to spend what you have to spend.
@K D, Content is a good way to look at it. I am very grateful to have everything I need, plus many things I want. 🙂
I was just wondering the other day about Amy Dacyzyn and what she’s up to now. Her kids must be grown.wondering if they are enjoying retirement and empty nesting on the proceeds from her success?
Hi Jen! That photo of your son in costume with the three dogs behind him is hilarious. I don't know why, but particularly your son's expression and the golden retriever with the ball in his mouth were so funny to me. Such a golden retriever thing.
Also, I would love to walk around your garden. I am incurably nosy about what other people grow and how, and yours sounds delightful.
@kristin @ going country, I know what you mean about being nosy although for me it's kitchens.
@kristin @ going country, That is one of my favorite photos. The fact that all three of my dogs plus my baby were sitting nicely in the frame was a miracle!
Every spring, I spend a lot of time potting up my tomato plants in the driveway and it’s funny how much attention I attract. People definitely enjoy checking in on what everyone is growing.
@JenRR, We had a photography session with my son, aged one, and my two dogs at the time with a well known photographer. The photos are my treasures. So wonderful.
Then, when my daughter was two and my son was four, we did another photo session with both kids and the dogs. NIGHTMARE. Two little kids, two dogs--trying to keep them all in the frame was so bad. The photographer and my ex and I all needed a very large stiff drink afterwards. The pictures are pretty cute, actually, considering that my daughter was very tired (fell asleep in the car ride over), kept crying because of this, got her hands snotty, got dog hair on her snotty hands, then rubbed dog hair into her eyes, and so on. Yeesh.
@JenRR, Man, I agree it’s a keeper. I was impressed with how well behaved your pups are to pose so nicely, let alone that adorable baby.
@Rose and Erika JS, That does sound like a nightmare. My dogs have always been better than my kids at sitting and staying on command 😀
@Rose, this description is hilarious!!!
Hi Jen! You children (not to mention pets) are so completely adorable. They look lively and fun.
I too adore historic architecture and have many times dragged my children around old houses and palaces. I went back to school to be an architect when I was 36; then 9/11 happened, a number of my friends were killed, and I had PTSD and never went back to architecture school. My professors hated that I always wrote about 19th cnentury architecture instead of Mies van der Rohe, too. One of them practically had a heart attack when they assigned me the Farnham House and I said, "How great of a house is it if no can live there?" Ooops. Thus endeth my architecture career and I eventually went back to writing/editing.
One more thing: are those lions from Fisher Price? They look very familiar to me.
My mom saved a lot of our toys, too, for my kids, including my younger brother's large Star Wars AT-AT (turned out to be worth a lot of money) and one toddler toy. My mother said to me a few years ago, "You liked that toy, but you always dropped it. And you dropped it on purpose!" It never broke either. I said, "I wanted it to break so I could play with the little toys inside." Mom's jaw dropped that I could remember that. It was this:
https://www.ebay.com/itm/186099283716
@Rose, Farnsworth House, doofus.
@Rose, you just put your finger on a reason why I don't like award-winning or cutting edge design. Many designs are "boring" and "stale" because we use them all the time. You know why we use them all the time? Because we've had the same needs for centuries or millennia and have figured out what works well. Going for something new always seems to involve ignoring what works in favor of what's different.
@Rose, I'm with you and Jen about the architecture! Some of those ultra modern monstrosities are just ridiculous. I dream about living in a big Victorian home, but the older I get, the more I'm content with just having a one-story dwelling.
@William, you are so right!
@Rose, that house is just ugly. Completely uninviting. Very cold character.
@Central Calif. Artist Jana, That's the International style for ya!
Try "From Bauhaus to Our House" by Tom Wolfe for a critique of the style. If anyone cares enough.
That said I've seen a lot of really good and beautiful contemporary architecture that's even livable! Heh. But gimme an old house every time. Mine's not that old (1920) except it is old for this town.
@Rose, I had that exact chime ball!
The lions in my photo are Playmobil, but I think you are remembering the lions from the Fisher Price Adventure People toys. We also have one of those that my Aunt passed down to my kids after her grandkids outgrew the toys.
I love pre-war architecture and grew up dreaming of Victorian houses with turrets! My mom would drive me around old neighborhoods just so I could look at them. Even average buildings from the 1930s had beautiful wood doors, cabinet details, tiling, etc. I’m definitely more HH Richardson and less Ludwig Mies van der Rohe. I could not do the glass box thing.
@Rose, of course then I had to go look it up and take the virtual tour. I love creative ideas, many many kinds of ideas across all ranges of vocation, and the idea of this house is no exception. But where it's not a plausible solution to "home" — kind of like with tiny houses that are so clever in use of space and also so cute, but realistically are only useful for overnighting — that's where I am no longer on board with it. Like, good job executing! Now what are you going to do with it? So often, it's just to let it sit there and be adored, or become a location for people who made it or used it to be adored, and that's not super worthwhile, in my opinion.
@JenRR,
Same here with my love of pre-war architecture! I live in a small Midwestern town surrounded by corn fields (and soybean fields, as well as numerous horse farms and even a yak farm). My town has gorgeous Victorian homes, as well as a variety of other classic architectural styles. The Victorian home I'm thinking of specifically has a long, narrow stained glass window of a peacock that is visible from the street. Just walking around our small downtown and driving along Millionaire's Row is a feast for the eyes. While I also love MCM and modern architectural styles, I would never consider living in a house like that. I guess I admire the art, but not the (lack of) functionality, of such homes.
@Rose, I believe they are Playmobil lions! We had/have the same set. I say "have" because they're probably somewhere in the garage right now.
@Liz B., I’d love to see more horse farms around here. A yak farm also sounds interesting. Around here, we just have cattle and some very stinky pigs.
It sounds like you live in a beautiful place. Victorian architecture is so complex I’m not sure how they ever dreamed up and figured out how to build all those buildings.
@JenRR, gads that makes me suspect in which state you reside. State of more hogs than people.
@Selena, Thankfully, we don’t have very many hogs, they just seem to smell a lot worse than other animals!
Hi, Jenn, from another Midwesterner/college town/cornfield resident! (I wonder how many of Kristen's readers fit this category?)
I feel you on the allergies=higher food bill. We avoid sugar and most sweeteners, except for xylitol, which is more expensive than sugar. One way we get around that is just eating very simply; only my youngest and a couple other kids even eat bread; I stopped buying GF bread for myself a long time ago (still crave it, but it's so expensive and I don't need the calories!). And recently developing nut and dairy allergies has been fun!
@Karen A., Hi! No sugar would be hard, so is developing allergies later in life! I didn’t know I had a shellfish allergy until college when I had a reaction to a single crawfish. Thankfully, I didn’t like shellfish much anyway. Nut and dairy is much more difficult! The meals I make tend to be very simple, too. It’s easier to control ingredients and cheaper than more convenient options. Unfortunately with the bread, a sandwich is the only thing he’ll eat in a packed lunch that I can add some protein into. We save it for school days. He’d much rather have hot meals while at home, so that works out for minimizing the expensive bread use.
@JenRR, You do what you have to to get them to eat! Do you mind me asking what brand of bread you get for him? All my experiences with GF bread have been sadly lacking.
@Karen A., He likes the EnerG tapioca bread. I personally couldn’t eat it. It’s very dense, but thankfully he’s never had fluffy wheat bread to compare it to. I recently ordered him a couple types of Schar brand bread to try. He loves their ciabatta rolls, so I’m hoping he’ll like their sliced bread.
Hello, JenRR! I agree with Kristen that your photo of your daughter with the okra is delightful--and that's a mighty fine fistful of okra, too. (I adore okra but no longer try to grow it. Not only does it not really thrive here in Central NY, but the deer adore it as well.)
And I also liked the photo of the kitten about to pounce on one of its friends. Feline 101st Airborne??
Finally, I hear you about (a) the Tightwad Gazette stick deodorant trick (that one didn't work so well for me either), and (b) the treasures to be had in a college town when the students move out. Although I've largely retired from May trashpicking, I used to make out like a bandit, both from the stuff left on curbs and from the stuff DH's student tenants used to leave behind.
@A. Marie, Thank you! She loves the plants in the garden, although, she will flee at the sight or sound of any buzzing insect. I always thought of Okra as a southern thing, but I experimented and was surprised at how well it grows in my yard. It loves the heat and strong sun in late summer.
Airborne pouncing kittens always make the day more enjoyable 🙂
It’s funny to know multiple other people tried that deodorant trick!
Hi Jen, I too live in a midwest college town and also tried the deodorant hack once (it didn't end well).
@Jill A, Hi! It’s funny how many people here tried that deodorant thing! I guess now we have at least warned everyone 😀
I think frugality is a mind set. I will save money on these things so that I can spend money on the other things. We all live different lives and in different areas with different people in our families. I think we all just do frugal differently.
Your SUV sounds like my BRAND NEW minivan with only 32 miles on it. We bought it and rolled debt (don't ever do this) from the previous car into it (over 32000.) But I committed to driving it into the ground as its only owner. 210000 and 13 years later it needed a new engine and I sold it to a guy for $400. This van was an important stop on my frugal journey.
@Amy cheapohmom, Ouch! My SUV was a major pain the first few years with random things going wrong. I was surprised I made it 14 years with that thing.
@Amy cheapohmom, I wanted to buy a recent used car when I replaced my old one but the cars are so durable that none are available for much less than what a new car would cost. If I'm paying that much, I might as well get new. Maybe next time I'll have better luck.
@JenRR, it had 8 recalls in the first year alone. I wanted to cry.
@WilliamB, the car market kind of sucks right now. We want to replace my husbands truck; but just keep saving because the old one is still running, and the used ones are almost as expensive as a new one.
It’s nice to meet you, Jen. The photos that you shared are wonderful!
First of all, I must congratulate you on your ability to juggle so many conflicting allergies and sensitivities. I am allergic to wheat, my daughter is a vegetarian, and one of my son’s avoids legumes and onions. When everyone is home, meal planning is tortuous.
I also admire the discipline and thoughtfulness that you employed when you purchased your home. When we bought our first and apparently our forever home, I thought that we would eventually move into a larger house. Life was busy. Things became more expensive, and we stayed put. During the Great Recession the market changed and we thought about moving. We realized that we didn’t really need a bigger house, and we certainly didn’t need a bigger mortgage.
It still amazes me how many readers have been influenced in some way by Amy D’s Tightwad Gazette. I used her method for storing my children’s clothing 25 years ago. However, I never tried her deodorant trick. My husband who grew up in house where they kept everything became quite upset when he found a bag full of deodorant ends. Ditto pieces of used soap.
Thanks again for sharing! I hope your harvests are plentiful this year.
@Bee, I grew up with a hoarder mom and would have had the same twitchy reaction as your husband if I had discovered a deodorant scrap stash! Sometimes I have to balance frugality against my mental health.
@Bee, oh my gosh- the pieces of used soap brings back memories of a former work colleague whose in-laws stashed loose gems in pieces of used soap (the equivalent of having money buried in the yard) and instructed them not to toss any soap pieces if they ever had to clean out the house.
I was recently reading an article about where/how people stash money in their homes - particularly the elderly. People wrote in with anecdotes about how and where they found cash when cleaning out a loved one's home.
We had neighbors who bought an older home from an estate. Years later they initiated a remodel project and came across thousands of dollars hidden away. They stopped the project, went over to the home of some family members of the prior owner who lived in the area and asked them to come to the house and take the money away and do what they thought appropriate.
@Bee, Thank you! Meal planning is for sure not my favorite thing! We compromise by typically doing dinner together and saving personal preferences for other meals/snacks. Vegetarian meals avoiding wheat and legumes is a tough combo! My son used to be allergic to soy and beans in general, but thankfully outgrew those allergies.
Thankfully, the drawer of deodorant ends was retired. That one experience was enough for me!
What a fun interview! I loved the okra and kitten pictures (& Meowsian Village), and also the one of your kids trapping themselves in the cabinet. And I also love all the neat things you grow in your garden (you know you're in it for the long haul when you grow asparagus), and how it helps you meet the challenge of all the allergies in your family. My mouth is watering for those purple raspberries.
Do you have a game recommendation for one that's easy to learn (e.g. if you have guests), and good for a variety of ages?
@Suz, Thank you. I love that you noticed the Meowsian Village!
Our favorite family game by far is Uno Attack. You can also do regular Uno, but we enjoy the extra fun of the card machine. My kids learned to play in preschool once they knew some color and number basics. It really helps that the basic idea is to match colors/numbers/symbols. We’ve played with aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc.
@JenRR, We are also a big UNO family! The current favorite here is Star Wars UNO.
@Karen A., Star Wars Uno sounds fun! I have a couple of Star Wars mega fans in my household that would love that.
Thanks for sharing Midwestern frugalness. Just keeping the home you purchased at a good price and interest rate is a huge frugal win.
St Louis has sooo many places that are free or at a very small cost. Our family favorite is the zoo!
@Jennifer G, We love the St. Louis zoo! We lived in STL when my oldest was born and I’d take him there all the time. So many memories. My kids still request a visit to the zoo almost every time we are in town. The Science Center and Laumeier Sculpture Park are other favorites. Last summer, we even tried out the free trolley from the History Museum.
Your comment about your husband's job resonated with me. We, too, went through that uncertainty when kids were little through middle and high school. We learned to live well below our means and I went back to teaching. Eventually we both moved on to better paying positions, but I remember the many years of living lean. It's taught me to continue to live well below our means. And also, it's made me realize that most times things do pass. Our three either out of college or about to finish. And I'm constantly reminding those early in their careers to live frugally (you can do it well, like all the showcased readers demonstrate in these posts) as well as the activities they see their Dad and I do were things we never did before they all began to leave the house.
My husband and I are leaving today for a frugal trip south: airfare paid with miles my husband saved during his many, many work trips, hotel paid with points as well as parking for car (see above). We found a great price on a rental car for the week ($61). We will visit free places in the area and try to spend wisely. Had we not had the experiences we had all those years ago, I shudder to think how much money we would have wasted. Here's to the frugal living mindset!
@Monika, Enjoy your trip! My husband has been trying to convince me to go on some more frugal adventures, but I need to work on reducing my fear of flying first. I hope you have a great time!
@JenRR, My DS2's MIL is terrified of flying and his wife dearly wants her mom to visit, especially since her dad passed away last year. It’s a 4-hour flight. Do you have any tips you can pass along that I could suggest to her?
I’ve heard there’s a medicine that can be prescribed but I’m reluctant to urge meds on an older lady. Thanks!
FWIW (probably nothing), I was always terrified to fly. I mean, literally coming to terms with my own death on every flight. Then my doctor prescribed Cymbalta for my fibromyalgia and my fear of flying disappeared.
So--I guess I mean try some meds? Not an antidepressant like Cymbalta but maybe something else? Not being afraid to fly made my life a lot easier.
@Erika JS, Ask her doc about trazodone. It is used as an anti-depressant med, an anti-anxiety med, and a mild sedative; used for dogs and humans. It's generally quite innocuous.
@Erika JS, I have a prescription for clonazePAM, but have not been able to fly for years due to panic attacks that start with just planning to get on a plane in the future. I’m not afraid of flying itself, but being surrounded by people on the plane. Right now, I am working my way up to flying by increasing my exposure/tolerance to uncomfortable situations. My upcoming next step is a train ride!
I think the first step is to talk to a doctor so they can address the cause of the issue.
I'm also an architect who thought once I got a real job, life (and finances) would be easy. That was SO far from the truth. In 2008 I got basal cell carcinoma and had surgery in December, and the following December I got laid off. Then in January the bank foreclosed on the small apartment building I'd moved into a few months before. It was such a tough time, and I'm really, really lucky I came through it in better shape than when I started, although I switched from architecture to government medical budgeting for about 8 years just to have a steady job.
@Candace, That sounds like a really rough time. I’m glad you are in a much better place now.
Did you like architecture when you worked in the field? It had always been my dream, but I found the reality of it to be much less inspiring.
Welcome to the MAR crowd! I, too, was hesitant to do one because I'm not super-frugal eithee (in fact I'm definitely in the spendy end of the FG readership soectrum) but all I got was support and interesting responses.
That toddler pix w 3 big dogs is golden. They're all at attention and he's just sitting there, stuffed in his suit.
Nice to learn more about you.
@WilliamB, Thank you. I love that this is such a nice supportive group of people.
That photo is one of my absolute favorites! When my husband and I got married, I brought the black and golden dogs into the relationship and he had the husky mix. Not too long after, we added the human puppy. The dogs were wonderful with my son and this is a great representation of all of them.
Jen, I really enjoyed your post. Your pictures are all precious and brought a smile to my face. Your garden sounds amazing and it's lovely that you're sharing your bounty. Thanks for giving us a glimpse into your beautiful life!
@MB in MN, Thank you for the kind words!
Your gardening skills are amazing, Jen! Wish I could grow food like that!
I've also lived in two college towns and you are so right about the stuff they toss. One of my coworkers told me she gets her family's Christmas trees from the curb around the local college, and she's never had to buy her kids any bicycles -- she finds them at the student apartment complex trash dumpsters at semester's end. I've salvaged books, lamps and even boxes of clothes this way, and I also buy (very cheaply priced) student discards at their garage sales and via Craigslist (a bed with box springs, and a free dog) at thrift stores (some charities pick up items from campus).
I empathize with you about the layoffs; that's happened to me more than once. People don't realize that their job can be ended at moment's notice, even though they may be stellar employees, due to factors beyond their control. That's why it is soooooo important to have emergency funds and not get big expensive houses, new cars, expensive furniture/appliances/other items, etc. I also bought houses where, in a few years, my house payment was cheaper than house OR apartment rent.
And about the clothes: I have a friend who has kept her weight down for all her adult life. She shows up at church in the most amazingly beautiful outfits ever; she tells us she bought them years ago, some even date back to the 1980s. She may combine different items to create a new ensemble but she dresses in classic fashions -- that no one can tell those aren't newly purchased from the ritzy department store. I have blouses and sweaters that date back to the early 2000s, as well, although they fit a bit more snugly now, oops.
Anyway, you are doing a fantastic job at "frugaling", so don't fret about how much or how little you save in a given season.
@Fru-gal Lisa, Thank you. Growing food has been very rewarding for me. It’s amazing to pick berries at breakfast time and “shop” the garden again before I cook dinner. That part still feels like a dream. The endless weeding part is much less fun!
It sounds like your friend has a great eye for fashion! Classics are a great way to go.
Everyone here has a unique approach to frugality. Some are frugal by nature, some by habit, some by necessity, some as a lifestyle, some to achieve certain ends for a specific time. Rather than an echo chamber, this is a buffet of endless ideas.
You, JenRR, are brilliant in your gardening, living below your means and staying put. You are also managing a tough juggling act of expensive food allergies, and it sounds as if you are succeeding! Being frugal in some areas frees up income for other areas.
Thank you for sharing. I particularly love the kitten photos and could NEVER live near such a place because I would become an Official Crazy Cat Lady.
@Central Calif. Artist Jana, I love the description of this platform as a buffet of endless ideas!
@Central Calif. Artist Jana, Wow. Thank you.
My daughter is cat crazy, but her father is very allergic, so these farm visits help provide some much desired kitty time!
Waving hello as someone who is on the frugal-light side of things! Sometimes I feel like an imposter around these parts. But I always keep in mind that frugality isn't actually a race to see who can spend the least. To me, it's about figuring out how to build the life you want with the resources that you have.
@Meira @ meirathebear, Hello! That’s a great way to look at frugalness. 🙂
Jen, thank you so much for sharing. I particularly appreciated your point about trends. I totally agree! I could care less about keeping up with trends. When I do spend money on things like home repairs or clothes I purposely try to be timeless or at least not directly on trend so that I can stretch that "investment" just a little bit further.
@Amanda in VA, Timeless is beautiful! It’s always satisfying when you can make use of something for a long time, and not get tired of it.
Thank you, Kristen!
I didn’t remember Zoe having curls! I’m sure she was extra adorable. Funny enough, my son’s hair is the opposite. It used to be straight and white blonde, but it has gotten curlier (and darker) as he’s gotten older.
My bags were all given to me by people who didn’t want them, so I’ve enjoyed saving them on multiple levels. I think it’s become a personal mission to make them last forever 🙂
The pictures of your children, especially the one where your daughter is holding okra, are impossibly cute! I, too, was lucky enough to have the money to invest in the exact gardening system I wanted. I am at the point where I am now longer focused on growing enough to feed us all year, so more flowers, but it really is a luxury to have a good garden space. Thanks for sharing your life.
@Lindsey, Thank you. I love looking back at those photos! I’ve cut back on food growing space, too. Perennial flowers are beautiful with much less work.
Nice to meet you, JenRR. I usually comment in the morning when I'm fresh. It's after our homeschool, and I'm running on empty. But it's so nice to see yet another perspective!
@Jody S., Hello! Thanks for taking the time to comment even after a busy day. Homeschooling would have definitely worn me out, too.
100% agree on thrifting clothes for older kids - the older they get the more complicated it can be. I know some towns have great thrifting options for tweens and teens (we live in a major metro area so we a lucky there), but smaller towns don't always have that option. Thrifting for my son was also much easier when he was younger and didn't have strong opinions on his style.
@Geneva, Yes! Millions of baby clothes, but less options every year after that, especially for boys. My son still doesn’t care about clothes, but my daughter was rejecting my choices by toddlerhood.
Jen, Awesome photos of kids and dogs and kitties! The one with the trio of pups lined up behind your son, the flying squirrel kitten, and of course your daughter with the okra are just so much fun. In fact, your kids are having so much fun in all of their pictures. It’s a delight to see. Thanks a bunch for sharing your household.
@Erika JS, Thank you. My kids are my sunshine and I love that these photos reflect that!
I so enjoyed meeting you! I am also a former victim of the college degree myth, in history in my case, but I had a wonderful and expensive time until reality hit. I have consoled myself with the idea that I live a richer mental life because of my education, but the world does not reward learning for learning's sake.
Coincidentally, I learned to be a very efficient secretary/administrator and worked for a large architecture firm. They specialized in big institutional buildings (prisons & hospitals) and several architects there tried to persuade me that the detail on historic buildings was "fussy." For homes, they felt the same way, but I like Richardson better too. Even Frank Lloyd Wright was rather demanding--his low ceilings would be a nightmare for tall people like my husband to live in. And the modern architects don't allow for the normal clutter of human life. My husband and I live in a house that was first built in 1895 and greatly improved from time to time, and we love its wood details and finishes and most of its irregularities. Our garage was built for a horse and buggy, with a hay loft, but has adapted very well to house two (small) cars.
Congratulations on navigating so many allergies. And on managing such a wonderful garden! I also live in a midwestern college town amid corn and soy fields, dairy farms and close to Amish communities. We used to go dumpster diving when the college kids left in May or June, until the college decided there should be a more orderly collection and a community garage sale in the fall, but the volunteers who used to manage that have gotten old and weary. So the happy days may come back. We are still using printers, shoes, clothes, and household items that students have abandoned, and hope they don't miss them.
The Tightwad Gazette has given me lots of laughs and humble pie over the years. I saved soap scraps, grated them and cooked them to reform them into quite credible "soap balls," but I am not convinced they were worth the storage of icky old soap scraps or the messy project of forming the balls. It was kind of a fun crafty project but I really enjoy not saving those scraps any more.
I'd rather sew. Good for you to keep your bags going. I do that for the fabric things I love, and they get better with each mend. They are distinct with stitches, patches, and launderings, and never get confused with other people's bags. I have come to appreciate the forms that old, used things acquire, like the famous Japanese mended coats. I have two very much loved and laundered nightgowns that are acquiring a lacy aspect from the machine darning I like to do. You can drop the feed dogs on most sewing machines to make circular, loopy designs in soft knits, a kind of lace that is also mending holes and worn spots. And renewing the garment...
Best wishes.
@Kristina, Hello! Your old house sounds amazing. I love the history and quirks of old buildings. Frank Lloyd Wright does some amazing things, but they are not always functional (ironically). I toured a house that had diamond shape beds to go with the house angles and based on those kitchens, he clearly didn’t cook. I’d rather have an old farmhouse!
So nice to meet you!! I love the pics and that you garden!! Woooooooo
@Stephanie, Hello and thank you 🙂
Jen,
This is days later than your post, but still hopefully helpful to you. There's another blog that has MANY house improvements listed, specifically basement makeovers.
Look at http://www.frugalfamilytimes.com
Good luck with your plans!
Beth
@Beth, Thanks, Beth! I will check it out.
Great pictures so thanks for sharing. I wish I could grow a food garden in Florida but the scorching heat often makes it an expensive venture. I do grow native flowers which seem to respond better to the heat!